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Divorce for SAHM

2 replies

Lostwords · 25/11/2018 14:41

Not sure this is the right section for this post, but I wondered if there any Mums who were SAHM when looking at/going through divorce? I'm really anxious about how we'd manage it financially without me going back to work full time, and I'd really want to be around for 1 year old and 3 year old more than I could if working full time, not least because we've all been through major trauma - 1 year old was born with life threatening birth defect and spent a lot of time in hospital the first year, with a number of life threatening episodes. She's doing better now. I'm hoping we can avoid divorce and save the marriage, but the relationship dynamics are so hard and I'm finding the difficulties too hard to live with if they go on like this. It's been this hard for about 6 months. We're having some couples counselling but are having to stop to go abroad to husband's home country for 3 months, so we'll see how things are once we've settled back. The financial implications of divorce feel overwhelming, not to mention the sadness because of the children. I very much feel DH needs individual counselling as well as our couples counselling to help him with the trauma we've been through as well as other emotional issues, but he's not keen. I've been having my own counselling and finding it helpful.

OP posts:
OrdinaryGirl · 25/11/2018 21:39

OP, maybe ask MNHQ to move this to the Relationships board? - there'll be more traffic there and I know people will have helpful things to say. So sorry you're facing this situation. Hope you can get the advice you need. 💐

shallichangemyname · 26/11/2018 00:03

Please be careful about going to H's home country. If he refuses to come back you will potentially be trapped there with the DCs. What country is it?
Google The Hague Convention on the Civil Aspects of Child Abduction.
The point of the legislation is that it is not up to one parent to decide where the children live and just take them. Only the courts of the country in which the DCs are "habitually resident" can decide that (if parents can't agree). Women married to foreign men are often trapped by this legislation.

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