Tell me why your children went to preschool

[ArriettyMatilda]

I am wondering as a sahp what is the benefit of putting my dd in childcare or into a preschool. It looks like I'd have to pay for two terms before she is entitled to the free bit as most places do a September intake. This means her starting at 2.5, which I feel could be too early (at the moment I feel 5 is too young for formal education). Also we literally spend what we earn, so where would I get the extra money from! I can't get my head around why this will be a good thing, except that one place I looked at, for example, expects 3 year olds to attend 5 sessions a week, so she would be going from nothing to suddenly doing 5 half days.

I know there would be lots of learning opportunities for her and time to be social, but I do take her to toddler groups and the sure start centre, plus music group. I could also take her swimming more regularly and we go for walks outside, to the forest and park.

Can any sahps persuade me otherwise? What will she miss out on if she doesn't start at 2.5 or even if she doesn't go at all?

It's a great way to get them used to being away from you in a setting with other kids before school. When dd first went she found it very hard for me to leave. I'm a single mum and not much other adult involvement, so I am very important to her (obvs all parents are but she's never been left with grandparents or other adults in their house for eg). For me I really needed the break, wanted time on the housework and I was worried how she would cope at school if I couldn't leave the room without her wondering where I went! She loves it. She has forged her own friendships, can make me presents, learns things I would probably not have thought about and has a new found confidence. It really works on more aspects than you would think. She only does 9-12, 4 days a week but it has been great.

I was SAHM when my DC were preschool age. They both went to preschool the term following 3rd birthday as that was when funding kicked in. Oldest is a summer born baby and I felt would be in formal school soon enough, so IIRC did 2 mornings the first term, and then went up to 3 mornings. I was working when he was younger and he went to a CM 2 days a week.

For my youngest, who was a winter born, she started with 3 sessions a week and then went up to 4. By the time she finished preschool I was back at work (and had a complicated set of arrangements of friends to pick her up each day). It was quite nice to have Fridays off with her.

I mainly wanted them to attend to give them the chance to mix with other children, without me there. It was also good to have a bit of a break!

Our nursery focuses on what the reception teachers are requesting: children are able to independently dress, put shoes on, eat their lunches unassisted (including opening things), go to bathroom, be use to routine of a group setting (ie if bell goes and teacher announces storytime, they sit down wih rest of class instead of wandering off to play with a toy, etc). Independence they learn within the nursery setting with their own peers is very difficult to replicate as a parent, in my opinion.

Thanks for the clarification LibrariesGaveUsPower (great user name btw, it always makes me sing!)
My older two went to playgroup from two and a half. I stayed most sessions to help out though as they had a system where each parent was supposed to stay on a rota but you could pay another parents session if you couldn't do yours as one of few SAHMs I often covered sessions for others.
My younger two didn't go as I knew DC3 would get his free hours at the school when he turned three so waited for those. I didn't with my youngest as there was only 16 months between him and DC3 so it was nice for me to finally spend some alone time with DC4.

Dd went at just turned 2 for three mornings per week. Dd at this stage was not talking. Within 4 weeks of her starting she was chatting away holding conversations with adults and children and loved every aspect of it. Ds went at 2 because I needed a break. Both absolutely loved it, my dd because she was able to meet other girls her age and chat and play with sand and water and paint and draw. My son for playing Scooby Doo with like minded boys and getting up to as much naughtiness as he could with out getting caught.

IME preschool is brilliant. All mine have loved it. I find sahp use preschool for one or more of the following reasons:

Although a sahp, they work a few hours a week. Either can't afford or don't agree with child care but once naps etc stop need some time, hence preschool. Often use preschool from age 2.

Want to take advantage of the social and educational opportunity. Plus often to get dc used to time away from primary carer. I find these parents tend to wait for the free hours age three.

Parents with free hours eligibility age 2 I find are 'encouraged' to send their dc.

Which all sounds really sniffy. It's not meant to! Preschool is great, I don't know anyone who found no benefit for their child.

There are some really good points here, particularly regarding how preschool/playgroup/nursery school helps with independence away from parents, routine, self care skills, developing friendships and for me to have a break! Thank you.

Well I guess part of my concerns is that dd will be too young for academic education but you've all reassured me that's not what it's about. Unfortunately cost may drive us to wait until dd can get the free hours but I'll be sure to keep taking her to groups, as well as to the library and spending time outside. Any other tips on keeping 2 to 3 year olds busy and what can I do to prepare her for preschool?

My DS is a September baby and so gets his funded hours from (next) January - he'll be entitled to 5 funded terms in total. I can see how ready to go, even now - when we go to playgroups, soft play or the park he is DESPERATE to play with the other children.

Luckily for me, our local nursery which is in our sure start centre is "only" £10 a morning (3hrs) and they are plenty happy for him to go for just two mornings a week so he'll be going from September. I'll see how he goes and increase him to 3 and eventually 4 mornings a week when he gets his funding - I don't want him to do 5 days till he has to.

Oh sorry, when he goes in September he will be 3 (exactly) and very ready for it.

My tip is assume they can do something until they prove otherwise. I often forgot just how quickly they learn/grow and as parents we get into a routine and forget that what they couldn't do on their own 3-4 months ago, they might be able to do now. My DH would make mine struggle before helping with putting on shoes, for example. With me, they always whined they couldn't do it before they really gave it an earnest effort.

My ds started pre school at 2.4 for 2 2.5 hour sessions a week. We hadn't planned that he would but decided to do it as my daughter was due imminently and with no family around I had a sudden panic that I would like some time one to one with her when she was born. Luckily we had saved some childcare vouchers as I had been due to return to work so used these to fund the preschool.

To be honest, looking back I think he was too young. Some of the 2 year olds in his "class" liked it, but ds only really started to love going the term after he was 3 which is when he got his funding anyway. The preschool he was at charged a top up so we could only ever afford 3 days a week there anyway.

He is autumn born and is just finishing his final year at a different pre school this week (we moved last summer holidays) and I can honestly say he totally loves going there 5 mornings a week. He was such a shy and quiet boy but has made some lovely close friends from being with the same children every morning, and he will go to school with them too which I think will ease his transition. He loves all the activities and just having his own little independent world.

I would say pre school is a brilliant thing for preparing little ones for school and making friends. Only you can judge when is the right time, but I would definitely do it at some point before "big school".

My dd starts in September for 2 mornings and she will be 2.6. I think she is more than ready and has her t-shirt on begging to go every morning already as she sees her big brother having so much fun there.

We sent DS1 purely because we suspected HFA but were aware that he comes across as fairly "normal" when you first meet him. We wanted someone who wasn't his parent to spend time with him to see if they'd pick up on the same things. It's taken 2 terms of pre-school but we're now waiting for the HV to sort out the paperwork & should be told sometime in September when we'll have our first referral appt.

He's enjoyed some aspects of it having someone sit & read to him all day who isn't trying to sort the washing at the same time but struggled with others like all but one of the other children...! We're still in 2 minds about sending him back in September because he does struggle with the social aspects & with the best will in the world the staff aren't going to be able to support him constantly when they've got lots of other children to look after too. It's got to the point where he cries in the morning at the prospect of one particular child being there but has a fab time when said child doesn't turn up. We're going to HE anyway so I can help him with his socialising there's a huge local HE group so I'm reluctant to send him back... DH is somewhat more keen but can't articulate why! We'll send him for a while in September I suspect but I'll pull him out if the issues with the other child continue. The only thing that's not making me insist that we don't send him is his best friend from toddler group who also goes to the same pre-school. We won't be going to that group after the summer but they adore each other & I'm reluctant to stop them spending as much time together!

Mine both blossomed at preschool and it prepared them for school in a way that I just couldn't do as a parent.

DS2's last day was today, and I was so sad - the preschool they both went to has been a huge part of our lives for the last 4 years.

My DS just had his last day at preschool today (well, a leaver's party! ) He is a July baby - only just 4 - and starts school in September. He started preschool last October (would have been September except we only moved into the area in September and I had to get it sorted out). He has had the most fantastic year. He did 5 half days from the beginning having never been away from me for 3 years, apart from 1 or 2 weekends staying with my DM. He took to it like a duck to water and it has been so so so good for him in building relationships with other children and learning how to play with other kids. We always did loads of toddler groups etc but it's just not the same as when you're not there. It has definitely helped bridge the gap to primary school, and he has a handful of little friends starting school with him.

I had DD the July before he started preschool, and it's also been great for us to have a little time together without DS!

I was a little emotional walking away today thinking back over what has been such a wonderful year for him and how much preschool has helped in his development.

My DS has speech delay and is an only child so we put him into pre school at 2.4. He only does two mornings a week and it's great for lots of reasons.

• he gets to socialise with other children
• he does activities and plays with toys that he doesn't get the opportunity to at home.
• he has a key worker who monitors and encourages his progress and gives me advice and information re. his speech delay
• I am making friends with the other Mums and my son is getting invited to parties and celebrations which I love
• he will go into the funded sessions at three already knowing the staff and routine which means we can build up to 15 hours without it being a shock

Ahh crud, after reading this post I'm now worried I've left it to late to get my DD1 into the local Pre-School. She turns 3 in October so wouldn't get the free funding till January but I can't find any info on the website as to whether she can start in Jan or if they only do September intake. Sent them an email asking for more info so fingers crossed they get back to me soon although with it being the summer holidays I'm not sure if they will till term starts. Ugh, should have got this sorted months ago but with the arrival of DD2 and a bereavement in the family I've had a lot on my plate.

Getting lots of pressure from certain family members to get her into a nursery or 'playgroup' and I'll never hear the end of it if she doesn't start till next September. There's also the fact that I think she's 100% ready for it and that she'll love it. I'll feel like I've let her down if she has to wait any longer.