Would moving to be right thing to do?

[Thinkingofmoving1]

Sorry not sure this is in the right category!

Would you move taking these things into consideration?

I have wanted to move out my my town for a few years now. We haven't due to older child and his dad, I wouldn't want to separate them and I wouldn't want to be separated from my child. We currently have my child every other day.

There's a village about 25/30 mins away (on a good day when no rush hour traffic) that has houses much bigger than ours within our budget. You get much more house for money.

Pros -

Bigger garden for the kids (ours is the size of a stamp and they can't run around in it).

• More money for house, we need 4 bedrooms and are currently in a three bed with the five of us.

• Village location - current location is full of drug dealing

• The nearest secondary has an outstanding Ofsted rating.

Cons

• Currently eldest child school is two minute walk away and settled there. May be able to commute child to current school if we get up earlier.

• Other two kids are settled in primary

• One child is Y5 and on top of the waiting list for an assessment after waiting a few years for it so don't want to upset that , although moving would likely be a year away realistically.

• it will be slightly further away from my parents who are elderly. They are independent at the moment but unsure what the next 10 years will entail.

• Our current house has a lot of work that needs doing to it which we don't really have the money for.

• Not as close to the hospital as we are now, we have had to go quite a lot due to one child health issues. However can get there within 30 minutes.

What do you think?

What year is your oldest in ?

Eldest is Y9.

Moving you oldest 30 minutes from dad and friends feels a bit harsh.
What does their Dad think?
Would you be prepared to only see you oldest every other weekend and school holidays if they pushed back against the move, as would be their right at this age?

Well that's why it hasn't happened. I'm thinking about my child and his dad.
If I am able to commute him to school it wouldn't change his routine.

But at 13/14+ friends and social life are super important, how are you going to manage that side of commuting for your son? What does you son think about moving?

He's very rarely our with his friends. He's not that bothered going out with them - at the moment anyway. He also asked why we can't move, he is desperate for his own bedroom as he has to share with the youngest.
However he may not realise the complications It would come with.

I haven't mentioned anything to his dad as me and my husband are in the early stages of discussing it.

I am so unhappy here, and this town is nothing like it was 20 years ago.

Given all your information, yes, I would move. It sounds like a better place for you all overall.

It sounds like the right thing to do. Perhaps changing the shared care arrangements with your ex would make it have less of an impact on your eldest