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Rural living

Looking to relocate to the countryside? Find advice in our Rural Living forum.

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Original poster

What's it like growing up in a village?

40 replies

zcjtb43 · 08/02/2022 05:48

We find it difficult to make a decision about where to live.

We currently live in a village which is lovely - safe, local amenities etc. but both of us grew up in (small) cities.

We cant help wonder if there will be more choices of activities as the girls (3 year old twins) grow up if we moved, although cities feel less safe of course, with more visible evidence of the harsh realities of life. There's more choice of schools. Rural life sometimes feels a little bland and samey (winter doesn't help it's case!), with an average school and not much choice on education, and a half hour journey for education post 16. We're currently near no family either.

Does anyone else have this dilemma? We've been going round in circles for at least a year and it's driving us insane! I work from home which is a blessing and a curse on this question!

OP posts:

waitingformygirl · 08/02/2022 07:17

I grew up in a lone house in the country and longed to live in the local village. Dh grew up in cities and longed for a rural house. We decided to move to a town (pop 5,000). DD is 6 and there is lots for her to do but I am aware that when she gets older there might be a bit of travel involved. We do have train/bus links though.
It really depends on what your life is like I suppose. We plan to move a bit more rural when DD is up and away.

Spookytooth · 08/02/2022 07:23

It might depend on how important you think sports participation and music etc is for the DCs.

Livelifeinthebuslane · 08/02/2022 07:24

There's a big variation in villages. Mine was small with no amenities and not many other kids so I was lonely - not just spending a lot of time on my own but knowing my friends in town were all hanging out together in the evenings, which meant I was left out in conversations. But then there are other villages near us that are a lot bigger, almost like small towns, where there are other kids and stuff to do. I did consider a larger village, but decided in the end that the town would give my daughter more opportunities, and she has loved her teenage years, more freedom than her friends in the city but still lots of opportunities to meet others.

AdriannaP · 08/02/2022 07:30

@CeeceeBloomingdale

Honestly I hated it. Everyone knew everyone's business and the public transport was rubbish. If I wanted to meet friends as a teen I would need to take a bus to meet them then another bus wherever we were going or get a lift. I had to get the bus to school on my own whereas friends walked together. I live in a small town now which has more amenities, links and means my DDs have friends locally and can walk to school.

This was my experience too. No opportunities to do anything unless you get on a 45min bus. I lost out on lots of activities I wanted to do like ballet and swimming classes. I still can’t swim that well. In teenage years I couldn’t join friends for drinks/nights/cinema trips as DM refused to give lifts. You have limited options of friends as not many children in your school/year group. My education wasn’t great as the teachers were the same guys who had taught in the village for decades.

It was truly shit and I would never move my children to a village.

RagzRebooted · 08/02/2022 07:31

We've lived in a village for 12 years, DCs are teens now. Yes, it's a pain for having to give them lifts and they can't just pop out to the cinema/McDonald's or whatever. Activities are limited and taking them to clubs means a 15-30 min drive. As does shopping etc. I grew up with similar though, so it's normal for me.

DS2 is 14 and has spent the last few weekends out 5/6 hours a day building a shelter and cooking over a campfire with his mates. I don't have to worry about my DCs when they're out and about, because someone will have spotted them and they have plenty of places they can go for help.

Beamur · 08/02/2022 07:42

Depends on the village and the teens. I live in a small village but it's only a mile to the nearest town which has lots going on and an excellent train connection to big cities (several). I don't think this is particularly typical though! Kids have the best of both worlds here. Can mooch about in the summer going wild swimming and camping or get the train to towns/cities easily within an hour.
We offered to move to the next town when the older kids were approaching their teens and they didn't want us to.

changenametimeagain · 08/02/2022 07:47

I grew up in SA so school was a 15 min drive away, no public transport so lots of ferrying around etc. I had a great childhood - lived in the suburbs so sort of same 'amenities' and distance from proper town as a village.

alwaysmovingforwards · 08/02/2022 07:48

@CeeceeBloomingdale

Likewise. Grew up is a large town and moved to a small place when DC where little. For the reasons you state we moved back to a town when they were primary school age. Now teenagers they are happy in a town with things to do and transport links to go places. Personally village life is not for me - I found it boring, trivial, restrictive and intrusive. Even suburbia now is verging on a bit crap imo. The minute DC get their own places, I’m downsizing to a small place in a city

TheFnozwhowasmirage · 11/02/2022 20:23

I loved it,we live in the same village that I grew up in. The primary school is 1 mile away,secondary about 6 miles,as is the college.
Bus service is dire now though,the last bus leaves the nearest city at about 2pm and there are about 4 buses a day,none on Sundays or Bank holidays,so we do a fair amount of driving,but as I've always done it, I don't know any different.
My dd's don't stand a chance of getting drunk underage at the local pub as everyone there knows who they are and how old they are.
Neither of them are big socialisers,they don't like crowded noisy places and both currently ( 16+18) view the idea of living in a town or city with absolute horror.
They have horses and lots of other animals,which take up a lot of time,energy and responsibility,but that is what makes them happy.

Adatwistscientist · 11/02/2022 20:30

It's worth saying that even if bus services are regular, in my village, we never felt safe on them. Sitting on a bus as the only young teen for over an hour as it winds through villages to finally get to the nearest city with sketchy bus driver and elderly men. Not great. No phone signal either.

Sitdowncupoftea · 13/06/2022 17:49

I live in a village. I could not live in a town. We have no shops , poor Internet and no public transport. However I would not change it. I can walk out my door and look at woods and fields and can't hear a thing except cows or farm animals. I go into town sometimes and can't believe the noise and traffic. Each to their own but I prefer village life. My village is that small I know most people.

motherofdragons23 · 14/06/2022 07:57

It really does depend on the village. Ours is a pretty big village with a pub, shop, fish and chip shop, church, school, hairdressers. It's only a 10 minute drive from town and has very accessible bus routes. But we also have lovely walks and still feel very rural. There's a great community feel, if you like that sort of thing. Yes it can sometimes be a bit claustrophobic and people definitely do gossip but it's also comforting to know that there's always someone close by that you know. I wouldn't live anywhere else especially now that I have kids. I've lived in towns and cities and to me this is feels like a far happier and healthier upbringing.

I can totally see how living in a tiny village with nothing there and miles from anywhere would be an issue for kids and adults alike however.

MyNameIsAngelicaSchuyler · 14/06/2022 08:03

I wouldn’t even consider it with teenagers.

etulosba · 14/06/2022 08:05

I spent my early life in a village or just outside one and we moved to a town in my teens. I hated it. I moved back to a village as soon as I could.

HappyHappyHermit · 14/06/2022 09:15

The teens in our village seem to love it, they have freedom to explore the woods together, there are loads of bike trails and outdoor activities, we have good Internet etc. I think nowadays it's actually good for them to have the feeling of some space in quite a safe area. That said, we are 3 miles from a small town and only half an hour from a more built up area. For me, I couldn't live in a town, much less a city.

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