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Rural living

Looking to relocate to the countryside? Find advice in our Rural Living forum.

When your lovely plans fall apart...

17 replies

KO2018 · 03/10/2019 23:59

Hello mumsnet

It’s all gone a bit wrong.

We are living in the countryside and working in Bristol. Been here a year and absolutely living our best lives and loving our house and our village and everything. Country life is great.

We are so pleased that we have started trying for a family. So far so good.

However, this new job I have just started - turns out - not so great.

In fact it’s dreadful. Horrible data entry with massively stressful deadlines and a miserable team doing ridiculous overtime.

I’m also slowly realising that our commute of over an hour is not going to work when we are suddenly plus one. And if I get pregnant now I will have to go back to the horrible job in Bristol after my mat leave - or pay it all back. We can’t afford it!

Looking for local jobs and it’s frankly scraping the barrel compared to city jobs. Really dire employment situation. I also still can’t drive (and not for lack of trying either!)

So now - halting on baby plans, but prospects of leaving current job bleak and feeling like there’s no feasible means of escape from it.

Suddenly looking round our village and realising all the women are stay at home yummy mummies or wealthy pensioners.

Help?!?

Please tell me someone else has had this issue! What can I do! Sad

OP posts:
HennyPennyHorror · 04/10/2019 01:15

Well I feel for you as I'm in a similar situation...with a few differences. We live in Australia. Moved here (DH is Aussie) 4 years ago but we already have DC. Ours are older...but we moved to a rural town as it's beautiful with a great school.

BUT i am finding it a nightmare to get a job. I don't drive either...the jobs in our town go to friends and relatives of business owners (naturally) so there's nothing for an incomer like me even though people are friendly.

The city is an hour on the train...I'm looking there now. I think you should find another job in Bristol...an hour's commute isn't unusual even with children.

Get that sorted first....find a job that's better. Then when you get pregnant, you go on maternity...and when you return, the baby goes into nursery in Bristol and you collect them after work. You or/and DH have to share that responsibility. People do it all the time OP.

When I find a job in the city, my DC will have to become latchkey kids...they're 15 and 11 so the youngest is JUST old enough but it's a slight concern as my teen sometimes likes to go to her pal's house after school...so the youngest may be alone...I'm choosing to face that when it happens though.

I advise you to do the same. Get a better job first.

PurpleDaisies · 04/10/2019 01:22

Top priority is learning to drive. I live rurally too and would be totally cut off with no car. Are you commuting on public transport at the moment? Would having a car cut the journey time?

PurpleDaisies · 04/10/2019 01:26

Which side of Bristol are you on? World commuting to bath instead be an option?

KO2018 · 13/10/2019 18:20

Thanks everyone - very helpful advice!

I’m commuting by car with hubby

But I’m on the job hunt now and getting lessons again - wish me luck!

OP posts:
KO2018 · 01/08/2020 13:13

Hi - so this is a million years later but in case anyone comes by here. Update: I somehow found a dream local job, and left the Bristol job without a backward glance. Now I moped in or wfh and it’s wonderful!

Oh and I’m pregnant now too :)

OP posts:
IamEarthymama · 01/08/2020 13:16

Great news!
Congratulations on all fronts!

Guardsman18 · 01/08/2020 13:17

Lovely update. So pleased for you x

chipshopElvis · 01/08/2020 13:18

What a fab update! Congratulations!

Timeforabiscuit · 01/08/2020 13:19

That's a wonderful update! So glad things worked out!

KO2018 · 01/08/2020 13:26

Oh wow thanks guys glad I could impart some good news :)

OP posts:
Finfintytint · 01/08/2020 13:30

I love a happy ending Grin

FlibbertyGiblets · 01/08/2020 13:37

That is a super update. Thumbs up.

Pirandello24 · 01/08/2020 13:59

So pleased to hear this!

Chottie · 13/10/2020 07:07

@KO2018

I'm late to the party - but what wonderful news :)

Msmcc1212 · 13/10/2020 07:37

Congratulations!!! Lovely to read that things worked out so well. Flowers

Twinkled · 19/10/2020 19:20

Fabulous 🥰

BlueThistles · 23/10/2020 08:43

this is great 🌺

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