Do you live with a catastrophizer?

Yes - me - I am one. It drives my husband mad.

Yes I’m one and thusly single

Yes, I'm one.

I very handled it without medication but with therapy.

I guess I'm lucky in that I know I'm doing it, so, hard as it can be when I'm in that zone I adopt a strategy to stop myself.

I'd described my catastrophising like a tree. It starts at the base with a thought that's genuine and normal and then as I think about it, my.mind goes up the trunk and branches off madly in different ways with some extremely unlikely options. I also think I'm ADHD so some of the number of thoughts possibly stem.from that.

Following therapy I've taught myself to notice when I'm climbing the trunk and to say STOP and cut it off from branching out. It took me ages to learn to do. Now I can do that and pull myself back down the trunk to continue to think about the idea sensibly. Despite my head often trying to pull myself back up!

It's exhausting at times but Im much happier (less anxiety, depression etc) from understanding what's going on.

Interestingly COVID was one of those times that in the past my brain had imagined and catastophized. Not COVID as such but "everything falling apart suddenly" - it taught me that in extreme circumstances my catastrophising can be what's going to happen but we will cope and use what resources we have to face that IF it happens.

Good luck - if he can identify he's doing it that's the first hurdle. I'd recommend therapy then to learn coping strategies.

Reported. This is blatantly an attempt to get people to click on links.

Oh ok. Disappointing

Sorry @Ohmylovejune ive edited but meant to quote @AnxiousPangolin above not you sorry.

What we’re the links? I didn’t click after reading your comment

"catrapizer" ??

I know, right? It’s even spelled correctly in the first paragraph.

Maybe poke some crab sticks in through the window?

Sorry OP - couldn't resist. Please report your thread and get MN to edit the title!

OMFG I actually spat coffee all over my phone. 😂

Yeah, I'm in the wrong place. I thought I was in the cat forum 😂

My bad, I thought it was a spam post designed to get people to click on links. I assume you copied & pasted that first paragraph from another site.

Yep. DH can go from nothing to the end of the world in a heartbeat. He has had a few visits to A&E lately so I have seen his blood pressure, even accounting for being poorly and stressed (it wasn’t nice, I get that).

He’s going to be sent to meditation classes soon otherwise I’ll have a heart attack in my hands. One of the doctors did an ultrasound on his heart and thickening of the wall has started so something needs to be done.

I don’t want him to think he can take blood pressure pills and they will be enough. He needs techniques to bring himself down. I sent him to a psychologist a number of years ago and it did help but it was only a few weeks and I think she has worn off. I think the meditation needs to be thought of in years.

Yes, my mum's like this. She will massively overthink everything and come up with a worse case scenario and talk herself out of doing anything at all as a result. Fine when it's just her life she's writing off. Not fine when she tries to tell me I shouldn't do this that and the other because x, y, z disaster MIGHT happen. If she had her way, I'd be living in a sanitised box, never going out and never speaking to anyone. She wears her anxiety like a badge of honour and absolutely will not speak to her GP - she's got it in her head that she'll get locked up in a mental hospital if she admits that her anxiety is ruling her life. She also refuses to take anti depressants or anti anxiety meds in case she gets addicted. She refuses to talk to a therapist or counsellor because (in her mind) it shows some sort of character defect or personal weakness that she can't sort this out on her own. She's been sorting this out on her own for 70+ years now.... unsuccessfully. She actually seems to have some sort of pathological terror about getting help for simply not feeling anxious.

I've actually had therapy to navigate handling her when she's having an acute episode and also ways of questioning her thought process to bring her down off the adrenaline/anxiety high - very similar to what @Ohmylovejune describes.

It must be so hard if you can see it but the person can't. Especially if it means making big life changes.

I remember once wanting to sell.the house and move. Husband said we could once I was better. Thing is I knew I was ill. It was sort of schizophrenic in that my head was screaming but equally I knew at the same time i wasn't being sensible. I did wonder if it was hormonal or something and I'm.not schizophrenic!

I had anxiety medications prescribed but I didnt get on with them and I collapsed when I got up in the night for the bathroom and next thing I knew my husband was stood over me. I was so lucky to not hit my head on the way down. It scared me. That's why I approached therapy. I wasn't quite sure what I was going for exactly just that I needed to look for a solution.

I was lucky and found a fantastic one who helped me break things down and then deal with each issue. I guess I went about 10 times. I've been back twice since for about 4-6 sessions each. Mainly because if I find myself getting in brain knots (probably because I'm.ADHD) and can't "undo" myself, I know she can help me do that.

I am so glad I found this thread. This is me. It's like I can't let myself just be happy in the moment I have to be worrying about things in my head.

I actually realised half an hour before I read this thread what I was doing but I didn't know the name of what I was doing or that it even had a name.

That link was quite useful to me.

That’s me …I cannot do it anymore I’m getting help now for coping mechanisms I don’t want to worry over think or any of it anymore I’ve got G.A.D

My DP is very much like this, not diagnosed though but very clearly with anxiety issues as well (I used to work in CAMHS, so not totally unfamiliar with it.) It drives me insane. It's like living with a Dementor. He just always drains the joy out of everything for me with his catastrophic thoughts which he just HAS to vocalise.

I do have sympathy for him, I struggle with anxiety too and I want to make things better for him, but he just triggers it or makes it worse in me with his constant wanging on about everything that might go wrong. Does anyone have advice on things that work for you, or how you manage it?

Bump

I’m getting help for this I have GAD I’m now in talking therapy and they are helping me stage buy stage my next session is to show me coping mechanisms it’s really helping and until I get the hang of it I’m on anti depressants with an aim to be off them in a few months