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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

An idiot apparently

13 replies

ApparentlyImAnIdiot · 11/11/2022 13:15

DH last night in a grumpy mood, where he called me, in front of the school age children, “you are an idiot” “you are stupid” “you are thick”. Not in a jokey way, in a horrible angry way. I wasn’t arguing back or anything. I took the kids off to bed, but Im angry today. He has said previously in front of the kids im “a fucking idiot”. Am i over reacting, its not on is it. Hes playing it down and making me feel like im wrong for bringing it up

OP posts:
Fireballxl5 · 11/11/2022 13:19

He doesn’t respect you OP.
I’m sorry but I couldn’t live with someone who spoke to me that.
It’s a terrible example to the dc.
Does this happen a lot?

Mabelface · 11/11/2022 13:19

He's the idiot, not you.

Fireballxl5 · 11/11/2022 13:19

like that

Fireballxl5 · 11/11/2022 13:20

And being grumpy is no excuse.

Notanotherwindow · 11/11/2022 13:22

Well you're a grumpy old bastard with a small nob but do you hear me moaning? haven't done for years

Seriously though, I'd divorce him. Fuck dealing with that shit, what kind of example is he setting for your children? That this is how a man treats his wife and she just has to put up with it? No ta.

notmyrealmoniker · 11/11/2022 13:22

Not overreacting at all would he like you calling him a fucking dickhead in front of his kids? Of course not. It's unacceptable

Original poster
ApparentlyImAnIdiot · 11/11/2022 13:31

Sorry for posting a few times. The site was down, i didnt realise it would post a million times!! I do look like an idiot! 🤦🏻‍♀️

OP posts:
Choconut · 11/11/2022 13:40

ApparentlyImAnIdiot · 11/11/2022 13:31

Sorry for posting a few times. The site was down, i didnt realise it would post a million times!! I do look like an idiot! 🤦🏻‍♀️

Wow OP, you need to stop this idiot thing. You're not an idiot, it's the site being shonky. Please don't start believing what he's telling you. Your kids shouldn't be hearing this sort of thing said about their mum either - how does he think it will make them feel? He doesn't sound like a good person OP, and he's not even sorry, he's just trying to minimise it and making it your issue.

Original poster
ApparentlyImAnIdiot · 11/11/2022 13:41

I think we are at the end of our relationship. He often comes home in a bad mood, we tip toe around him. I hate it. He turns it round to me having but him in a bad mood, the traffic on the way home, works been particularly bad that day etc. i love when hes not here and its just me and the kids! Doesnt help hes a drinker too although hes never been violent to me or kids, he tends to be angry, no patience, slams door, doesnt really want to do anything other than sit drinking when at home

OP posts:
Original poster
ApparentlyImAnIdiot · 11/11/2022 13:46

Hes also, called me dickhead in front of the kids and done the wanky hand signal next his forehead, they saw. He just doesnt care

OP posts:
AttilaTheMeerkat · 11/11/2022 13:47

How can you be helped here into leaving your abuser?

You do indeed realise this is no relationship model for your children to be witnessing either.

Original poster
ApparentlyImAnIdiot · 11/11/2022 13:49

Its horribly broken. I admit that. I told him last night that was the final straw and we were over. He is carrying on today like that conversation didnt happen

OP posts:
Wombat27A · 11/11/2022 13:51

Not even enough respect left to believe you, very sad.

Defo ltb.

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