I'm a regular, have name changed. For over 2 years that I've been on MN I have given advice, laughed and cried at your posts but now I only feel numb. I really don't know what hit me.
I have a toddler and am nearly full term pregnant, Dh has been distant, travelling loads for work and done his own thing when at home (gym, sleeping, ebaying, drawing, by himself).
I felt something wasn't right, espesh one evening when he was on his blackberry messenger and I asked him who was on the other line. I had a bad feeling and persisted I wanted to see it. He told me I was paranoid and it was work. At 11pm , making him smile
After the last biz trip I put his media card into my own bberry and have found a handful of pictures from 2 women. One is fully clothed and looks a bit like me, the other is a total pig but there are more of her, some taken by herself, some by another person. One is in a bar with her legs apart and no knicks, one only in underwear showing her tats. She's a fat dirty blonde and I am seriously as to why my H would keep pictures of her.
When he came back to the car I hit him in the face with my backhand and screeched at him, not my finest moment I admit.
He was married before, 2 kids he hardly ever sees. His ex (who I've met) prefers it that way as we live abroad and she's happy with a ew man (long term relationship, great guy from what I can see). He told me he had cheated on her twice in the marriage because she wasn't interested in him, preferred the kids, etc. She wasn't on his level he said, blah blah..they didn't want the same things.
So off he went. Moved out and started divorcing. Fast forward we meet at work. All going jolly well. Then we marry, move abroad, have a baby and now I'm here. IN EXACTLY THE SAME POSITION AS HIS EX, only one child is still a bump and I watch history repeating itself.
Are you still with me?
The blonde minger is a girl from work he says, he took me to his work place that night and I rifled through his emails. A few flirty ones but nothing outrageous, the other is a colleague abroad, engaged to someone else just sending pics of her on hols. Oh and emails trying to be on the same flight, same hotel as my H on his last biz trip.
I have half a mind of calling his ex and telling her that she's lucky to be rid of him and can she give me advice, but I feel too embarassed.
He's away again. Doesn't even think it's really his fault. Says I'm all mumsy, not paying him enough attention, I don't work with him anymore, our babies come first, he's sick of nappies, he's sick of the rut.
We have my mum who's looked after our child more than enough, we had at least 10 great WE's away since she was born: London, Hong Kong, Paris, Beirut, etc. I go to the spa 2x a week for mani pedis, blow dry, etc. I look after myself, I cook, put lingerie on, give head, etc. Though not much sex (2xmonth) as horrid pregnancy and now a huge bump.
I feel so and empty, I can't trust him anymore and I don't want to try and continue pleasing someone who obviously wants very different things from life.
I could rat him out to his boss over these two girls but I'm not sure. Please, what would you do? I cannot talk to anyone in RL for fear that if I end up staying with him they'll remind me of this constantly.