i think OH has a 'victim mentality'

[booyhoo]

and i told him he needs to take the responsibility for how his life is. if he cant, we can't be together anymore.

i have always known he blamed me for certain things in his life but i have let them go unchecked because he doesn't take critism well at all and because he hadn't mentioned them in so long i hoped maybe he had gotten over it.

he hasn't, it all came out yesterday in an argument on the phone, he ended up hanging up in bad temper so i sent him an email telling him straight that those things were all his decisions and that he needed to be an adult and own the decisions before we could go any further to sorting them out.

i know, when he was on the phone it was so easy to 'chat' as if we didn't have this huge elephant in the room. i get the impression he thinks it is forgotten about. when i pulled him up on the hormonal joke he just said, "i'm just going to go now, i'll talk to you soon." he just doesn't want to sort it out. he wants to hide untl i forget about it an dthings will go back to the way it was. i know i just cannot go back to that. i know i am worth better. it is jsut so hard to make the leap. i know life will be better, i know i will be happier. i just still have that desperate feeling of wanting it to work. it is what has kept me here this long. i hate that the dses will no longer live with their daddy and that we will be a broken home. i know it is not the worst thing that can happen it just feels like i have failed both myself and my children.