So how to I stop feeling so hurt

[ant3nna]

I split up with OH of nearly 4 years on Tuesday night and since then have been crying almost non-stop. I can't sleep properly.

All I can think of is him going off with other women even though thats not why we broke up. I know that I was the only person he'd slept with and I just can't bear the though that at some point he will even do so much as look at someone else.

How can I start to get over this and piece myself back together?

Mm... may one politely enquire as to why you broke up? It might make a difference to the advice you receive.

Have some sympathy on account, anyway (unless you boiled his rabbit, we can't be doing with that sort of behaviour)

It will take time, but you WILL feel better eventually. Try and fill your time with things you like doing, do you have any hobbies? Surround yourself with friends.

I remember splitting with my first bf (he's the only one I was aver so upset about-more so than my ex h) and it took a good 6 months (we were together 6 years) before I could wake up not thinking of him.

Allow yourself the time to grieve the loss of your relationship but also make an effort to rebuild your life, the way you want it.

He split up with me because 'there was something missing which he thought he should feel if we were to settle down'.

He was the one who started all the settling down talk and he wasn't even sure what this feeling that was missing was.

Oh dear, that's not good. Very hard to get closure with a rather meaningless brush-off like that. Of course you're probably better off without someone with that attitude, but equally naturally you aren't going to feel that way at the moment. I can't add anything to LisaD1's kind and sensible advice, except to say He Wasn't That Into You and that you will find someone who is eventually, now that you're free to find him. I think they say that it takes a month to get over it for every year you were together, so just do those things she says for the next four months and you'll be fine (so easy to say, so hard to do).

You'll be posting on here inside of a year saying how happy your new OH makes you, you'll see

It is such a bullshit reason and I think that's going to take a while to sink in. I keep secretly hoping that he'll change his mind when he realises I'm not going to contact him even though I know I should try and forget about him.

Bullshit, absolutely. Feel for you

He fancied someone else probably [sad}. So sorry for you.

Nah, I reckon he bottled taking the relationship to the next level.

Ant3nna, you don't need to be with a manchild, you need someone to MAN up and be there, ready to commit to you and go forward.

That bloke sounded like a totally spineless prat, and one you are well shot of!

It may be that he's inexperienced at relationships, and isn't sure what he wants, or what a good thing he has.

But in any case, the right man for you is one who really appreciates you - not one who doesn't want to be with you. Harsh as that may sound.

You are better off being free to find the right man for you.

Took me 3 yrs to get over my Ex. . . its harder when you have kids, which i do. Ds goes to Ex every weekend. . .which has made it tougher to get over, even though my Ex treated me so badly and hurt me lots. I still want to hurt him now and its nearly 4 years ago. I still pray a large hole appears and he falls in it. !!
Time is a great healer and as time goes on you will get over it. . .you wont forget but you will meet someone else and move on with your life.

Wishing you lots of luck. X