Hi,
I hope that there is some really good advice out there. I'm a mum of 2 lovely teenage boys, and until 7 weeks ago was in a long term relationship with someone that I loved very very deeply. To give a little bit of background, it was a yo-yo relationship, but that stopped when he moved in with me, 7 months back. But over the last months, we had had more arguments, I felt that I was bottom of his list of priorties, after everything else in hs life and I longed for his attention. I paid all the bills, he was saving to renovate a house, and so he felt that I had to pay the bills for the moment, and when his house was ready in a few years, that my money would be my own. I have a fairly good job but do struggle for money, and it's not the money so much as the lack of care that it displayed for me. Anyway after a week away with his friends, he came back, I tried to talk with him about issues -mainly that he was selfish with his time, and that we really needed to work at things -he told me that he loved me. The next day after a planned stay at his mum's he didn't turn up, and when I rang, he finished this 4 year relationship over the phone and came later to pick up his things, very cold and told me that I deserved better and he couldn't give me what needed. Since then nothing, no contact. This time around, I havn't contacted him at all (cancer man - supposedly retreats into their shell) I know in my head that it's over and I'll never hear from him again, and as pathetic as it is for a full grown woman I'm absolutly heartbroken, on anti-depressents for 3 weeks, can't eat sleep or even function, he fills every waking thought, and after 7 weeks, it's getting worse not better, my heart literally feels as though it's breaking. I'm told that I will get over this, and I do really want to and feel some peace in my life again, but how?? A massive part of me thinks that this is all a really bad dream and that he will call and apologise - but that's not going to happen. I can't move on - what do I do - I'm desperate, I feel such a massive failure, and my self-esteem is at an all time low. Sorry sorry that this is so long.