Dating site etiquette

[partytime]

Hopefully you MNetters can advise me on dating site etiquette.

Have registered with one and have received e-mails - so far so good!!

One guy I liked the look of and e-mailed back.

But I have had e-mails from a couple of others who, I can only say (kindly) are not my type!!!!

Should I reply to all e-mailers even if they look a. weird b. ugly c. too old

Is that the right thing to do? I would hate it if I e-mailed someone and they hadn't the courtesy to reply.

But then I suppose I've answered my own question.

What do you think?

Thanks but no thanks only takes a few seconds. Which site are you on? On some, the sender can see that you've read the message.

I met my DH on a dating site. MY big advice is DON'T whatever you do mention you have DC's in your profile as there are some wierdos out there. I always let them know after they had made contact so I knew it was me they were interested in and not the children if you get my meaning. Good luck

Hmm,
I think if you dont want to reply back, then dont.
If they can see you have read it, and dont reply it will be fairly obvious that you'd rather not.
A friend of mine used to reply to everyone, saying "thank for the reply, but dont think we'd be compatable" if she thought there was something dodgy about the profile. (Trying to be nice)
Anyway she got a couple of very nasty replies so soon stopped.

Some people dont take rejection well.

I email everyone they might turn into friends, or lose interest.

I draw the line at sex emails from strangers though.

I haven't met anyone yet and don't really bother with it anymore....

Thanks everyone.

I've decided not to reply to all, like you say lilac they can see I've read it at least.

being I'm a bit unsure whether to bother with it as well.

Signed up a few months ago, stupidly one night with a mate when we had had a few to drink.

Chickened out a week or two later and removed my profile. Haven't been there since until this week, and I'm still uncertain if it's for me.

I get out and about a lot, my DC are late teens so no little ones to look after. I should be able to meet someone in RL.

ah bless

dont bother replying, ignore they will have likely emailed 100 women

and (you will thank me for this) dont arrange full evening dates! arrange "a couple of drinks before you do XYZ" then you can bail if you want to, and he can also, or lunch dates. keep it SHORT for the first one

there are ALOT of frogs and not many princes!

I would disagree with stoppingatthree. I would not say that I did not have children. I understand her concerns, but I think it's very misleading to present yourself as young, free and single but then turn round and say 'oh by the way I've got two boys'.

People soon show their true colours and if they keep asking about your kids etc., I think that should me a concern. Personally I prefer men with children. If they're in my age range (40) and don't have kids, I'm less interested as I don't think they can understand the reality of my life and where my priorities (and time!) lie.

Tell people that you have kids, otherwise your just wasting your time and others if they think you can run off for a weekend away at the drop of a hat.

As far a etiquette goes. I'd send them a message back. Nothing annoyed me more than my time on dating sites as to not getting a message back.

Don't respond to the copy and paste "fancy a shag" mails. But if someone has spent time asking about you then you can at least say "sorry no".

Lord know I know plenty of ladies that would climb the walls until "the one" they sent a message too replies. How would you like them to think...nah ugly I won't reply.

I agree about being up front on DC front, although I do understand why it would be wise to be cautious.

To be honest I'm a bit overwhelmed by the whole dating thing anyway. Never had to do this in 26 years, it is very scary.

I don't really feel comfortable with the internet and may withdraw my profile again.

As I said previously I do get out and about in RL, but don't seem to meet guys as I am always with married friends who aren't interested in going anywhere that would give me that opportunity.

People keep saying that it will happen when I least expect it, but does it really??

partytime I agree with the advice that's been posted here but also wanted to offer a few words of encouragement in your brave foray.

In my experience it may take you a bit of time (and a couple of not-very-good dates) to get used to the etiquette of internet dating, but it's worth sticking with it. Yes there are some careless/callous/weird people internet dating and there are also some really really really lovely, warm, genuine, beautiful, kind-hearted people. Getting to know people via the interweb is an odd thing, but I do think you can (with all due caution) get to learn things about potential dates in a couple of weeks of emails which it might take you years of RL interaction to discover.

I met my DP on a dating site two years ago and could not be happier. He is a wonderful, wonderful man who I adore more every day. Actually in my circle of friends successful internet dating relationships are quite common - quite a few weddings - and I wouldn't hesitate telling people how we met.

You really don't have anything to lose. It can be a right little voyage of discovery even if you don't end up with a partner. Wish you luck!

quodlibet thanks for the encouragement, I just get a little down about my situation and am impatient to begin a more joyful life, I've always wanted things to happen yesterday!

Just noticed another new thread on dating etiquette so will keep an eye on that one too.