Was doing really well. He left in March, then confessed there was an OW and we're getting divorced. Posted on here a lot about it. Was feeling really ok about it all 7 weeks after he'd left, after 6 weeks of crying and being so upset. Suddenly decided wouldn't have him back and that he didn't think he'd done anything wrong and so would never show remorse. Once I accepted that I felt really good. Went back to work and felt was coping well.
Then at the end of May I went on holiday with my 10 yr old DD on a cruise, planned and paid for last year, probably wouldn't have gone otherwise. Now I've been back 3 days and I feel almost back to square one. Had a nice holiday, but was very aware of a large number of honeymoon couples and people celebrating 50 year anniversaries of their happy marriages and started to feel sad again.
He's stopped calling round as much as he's moved to work in another town. When he does come round he's all sober, nice and gorgeous looking. Ofcourse he has to drive here so he will be sober. Not the drunken, face bloated, flushed, bleary eyed, emotionally abusive guy I had to put up with for the last year or so.
He hardly rings my daughter now, it was her birthday on the day of our return,he'd left her lots of pressies but had changed his shift so was working on that day, instead of being off, so could only pop by to see her for 5 minutes, which I thought was bad. He's since popped by just once more to see her for 15 minutes.
I've started being quite short with him on the phone when he rings to speak to DD. I keep imagining him with this OW all the time and hoping he's getting pissed around her and being horrible to her like he was to me.
Don't know what's gone wrong with me, I don't want him back, but liked seeing him and chatting to him. Now he just seems to have moved on totally and wants to forget my DD and DS as well as me, though I'm sure he would deny this. Spoke with him today and said that I'd thought he'd want DD to stay with him for a night next week, turns out he'd asked her and she'd declined as she doesn't like staying at his flat, prefers our home.
Is it normal to suddenly feel like this after doing alright for a while? Really worried as am back at work tomorrow and don't want to get upset. Got another holiday pre-booked for October and have just emailed the company asking what it would cost to cancel as don't want to go through this again.
SK