(please excuse me if I miss any 'e's out, my 'e' key is on the blink, and if I keep bashing the keyboard to make sure I always get it, I'll wake the dc's)
I've posted on here a few times, about the problems myself and dp have been having over th past few months. We have had a LOT of lieing, he's made moves on 2 of my friends (both when drunk), he spends money we don't have, he is the vilest person you could meet when he's had a drink, he verbally and occasionally physically abuses me (when drunk), he does sod all to help with dd (5 months), and once, just under 2 years ago, he forced me into a sexual act, although he did stop it almost straight away.
Today I finally told him I wanted him to leave, and he has gone to his Dads. He hasn't taken all of his things, as it would upset ds (2), just took a change of clothes. He rang me after about an hour saying he had forgotten his trainers, and when he turned up to get them he was all doled up in his nice jeans & top, hair done, aftershave on etc. He's going out on the fucking piss!!! Now I know it's got nothing to do with me now, but bloody hell, shows how sad he is for things to have ended.
So, please reassure me that I've done the right thing. We have 2 dc together, and I have never been with anybody else. I know now I am going to get people looking down their noses at me more than they do already, I'm 20 & a single Mum, I never wanted this. I thought we'd be together forver, I thought we could make it work. How fucking naive. I feel completely and utterly exhausted, and I don't know where to go from here. I don't work, I've gone back to college, so I'm either going to have to live off benefits for a while, or give up on my dream of being a midwife & get a job. I really don't know what to do.
Sorry for rambling.