*update on lapdancing / stag do saga*

[superv1xen]

for anyone that remembers (or cares about ;) ) my thread the other day...I have now spoken to my DP about it and explained my reasons for not wanting him to go lapdancing. and bless him, he was so lovely and he said that he didn't want to go anyway and if he had have gone along with it he would never have paid for a dance (and wouldn't have even if he was single) ...he has said that if they do end up going in then he will just go home.

also, i have spoken to the "stag's" fiance, who is absolutely devastated at the prospect of her fiancee going lapdancing...but sadly i don't think she is going to say anything to him, its the whole "trying to be a cool girlfriend" crap

also my dp was out with the stag saturday night (they play in a band together) and the stag do was mentioned, and the stag was bragging to DP and his other friends who were there, that he "couldnt wait" for his stag night to go lapdancing as "it was his last chance as a single man" now what the HELL this means, i dont know!!!

his fiancee would be even more gutted to learn exactly how damn enthusiastic her husband to be is about having some slapper rub her fanny in his face. but if she cant stand up for herself then what can i do??

i am so angry with her twat of a fiance.

she is such a lovely, beautiful, kind, loving girl and she does not deserve this arrogant, sexist bastard.

the worst of it is, he has a massive jealousy problem and hates her getting any kid of male attention, is jealous of her exes and comments on her clothes (ie, once, we were getting ready to go out and he told her to get changed as her dress was too short )

so if the boot was on the other foot and she wanted to see male strippers, he would go absolutely batshit.

I'm so glad that your suitation has been resolved - well done for telling your dp how you really feel. The poor bride to be - sounds like her marriage is off to a great start!

glad it is resolved, SV

and well done you for insisting it is not necessary to pretend to be "cool" about something when you are so obviously not

that takes strength of character

I feel sorry for your friend...it sounds like she will be learning some rather harsh lessons over the next few years

Her fiancee sounds like a real charmer, misogynistic, controlling, woman hating, hyopcritical, what's not to like?

The thing is though, why is your partner not man enough to tell his "mate" how sad and inadequate he must be to want to do this?

Only by his peers implying that he is a pathetic loser will he perhaps gain a better view of things, by not speaking out against it, the other men are complicit and in his mind they are approving of his behaviour.

Why haven't these men got the guts to speak out?

mal...because they haven't progressed much beyond the mentality of the schoolyard

i know, i know, i wish DP would speak out, i would love to have been a fly on the wall on their conversation on saturday night...i am pretty sure DP would have just laughed along with his friend even though he doesn't agree with what he is planning....why are men such spineless twats when it comes to their mates

grrrr i am angry thinking about the whole situation.

Cheer for the update I'm glad you're more comfortable about your DP's standpoint now - and glad for your mate that she's got you. I think she's going to need you

Don't let that stop you enjoying the wedding, though!