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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Confused - does this mean he is too?

8 replies

rancidamoeba · 16/05/2010 08:57

Posted about this before. Have been friends and had feelings for this person for a while. Didn't know whether to say anything because I was worried he didn't feel the same. Did nothing because I decided I didn't want to spoil things. Anyway matters took themselves into their own hands. Got drunk one night and we ended up kissing etc. Both decided we wanted to stay friends, and that was ok. Then it happened again. Had another talk where he said we should stay friends or we'd end up losing a lot. I spent about 2 weeks getting my head round it, then it happened again. The next day he was off. Didn't say anything. I want to know what's going on. The physical closeness is really nice, which makes it all the more difficult. Don't know what to do. He said before that it was just because he's male, and that he cares for me so doesn't want to do the wrong thing. It was not much more than kissing. Don't know how to sort it out. Maybe some time out?

OP posts:
CelticBanshee · 16/05/2010 09:06

Sounds to me like he doesn't want a relationship with you but wouldn't mind a shag every now and again

How to sort it out?

Tell him if you are to be friends, you don't want anymore tongue wrestling and to stop messing you about or you won't have a friendship left at the end of it.

thesunshinesbrightly · 16/05/2010 10:44

I think he is messing you around.

Time out,yes.

LoveBeingAHungParliament · 16/05/2010 10:47

Surely he can only be messing you around if he knows how you feel? One way to stop it would be to stop getting drunk with him. Or just tell him how you feel, if its werid anyway how much worse can it make it?

rancidamoeba · 16/05/2010 18:02

I did tell him how I felt. I've told him twice.

OP posts:
FabIsGoingToGetFit · 16/05/2010 18:05

What is because he is male?

He isn't confused. He likes snogging you, wouldn't mind a shag but thinks you will be clingy clingy and it isn't worth it.

ducati · 16/05/2010 18:09

IMHO, men are not confused at all when they are really into a particular woman. They are totally focused and go for it big time. I know it sounds harsh but I think he just wants to be friends with the occasional snog(at this point in time anyway) Mind you, if you met someone else, that would definitely focus his mind one way or the other.....

rancidamoeba · 16/05/2010 22:26

His reaction to physical closeness is because he is male and not anything to do with any feelings.

OP posts:
rancidamoeba · 17/05/2010 03:38

Somehow I feel he would not like it if I met somebody else, but then, with how I feel about him, I'm not going to.

OP posts:
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