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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

What to do for best?

1 reply

Balaclava · 12/05/2010 21:10

Have name changed as DH knows my regular posting name.

I went back to work part time last October. My eldest 3 DS's were in school and DS4 at nursery in the afternoons which meant finding a childminder, which we did.

Very long story short the childminder was incredibly unprofessional and it came to the point that I was going to have to give up work and go back to being a SAHM. This wasn't a problem for me at all.

However, DH thought a great idea would be for him to become a SAHD. So after a lot of discussion and his great positivity we went ahead with this.

BUT he is miserable as a SAHD and is getting stressed out by the whole thing. His eyes have been opened as to what I used to do all day and he has become snappy and irritable.

The line of work I am in has become very accounts based, when i started I had little to do with regards to figures but now I spend a lot of my day doing accounts.

I hate figures, have never been mathematical and work is now so stressful as to be a nightmare. I feel anxious all the time and have panic attacks. DH knows this and agrees I should find something else that doesn't involve figures.

I think the best solution would be for him to go back to work (he can get back in his old place with no problems) while I become a SAHM again until DS goes to school and then look again at work, perhaps do my Masters in the meantime.

I am so confused. I don't know quite how to broach it with DH, he was so excited about being the at home parent but I don't thi
nk it is quite how he expected it to be.

What would you do?

OP posts:
Plumm · 12/05/2010 21:13

Assuming you have a good relationship, just sit down and talk to him. He knows you're not enjoying your job, tell him you'd like to be a SAHM again and would fill your spare time by studying, then ask him if he'd consider going back to work or if he'd like to continue as a SAHD.

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