Does your Ex dp ever change?

[maltesers]

Just need some honest opinions please. Do you think he ever really changes or does the woman he is with now get to see all the crap, nasty bad tempered rubbish you had to put up with?
I often imagine he is now calm, conciderate, loving and unselfish or am i dreaming?
I always think OW will see some of it but not the whole nasty heartache crap he used to inflick on me.
Any thoughts on this subject are greatly appreciated.
Thanks.

they dont change ...my ex is still beating up the women he's been living with,in fact,he's getting worse!!

i think you're dreaming.....he may modify his behaviour slightly,certainly in the early days. but i think he'll be guided by the woman he's with at the time,with regards to how much he can get away with!

Its a difficult one because, who is going to tell you otherwise? Not the other woman thats for sure!! I just hold on to my belief in karma, although its a long time coming!

Well, she seems to be good at doing my sons ironing, cooking, washing and even getting my ds showered etc (he is 9yrs and can do it himself) She sounds a real sucker and kind to do all this as i know my Ex will just let her do it all while he sits watching the football/golf or down the pub. Just hope she is seeing after a year or so the real him and how he treats women. (DOORMATS)

Ooh, interesting question! I think people do change, as they get older. They accept things, have different priorities - I am certainly very different, in some ways, to the woman I was in my twenties. Some people genuinely have epiphany moments and turn their lives around.

My ExH has for the last few years actually held down a job! Something he never managed to do when he was with me. On the other hand, I know he still puts it about whenever he can, so some things never change!

It is all to do with perspective, too - my DH's ex describes him as violent, abusive, controlling - altogether an unrecognisable description of the very gentle, supportive, funny family man he is in reality. But he admits that they never should have been together, that he simply couldn't cope with her mental illness and that his self-esteem was at an all time low when they were together.

I think they do calm down as they get older. My ex is still shagging around at nearly 50 though! Im thinking when he gets to 50 that will stop or, his dick will fall off!! Its amazing how young women still go for the old codger. It must be his hair dye.

I split up with my ex four years ago and she hasn't changed a jot in that time. I had her newest boyf on the phone a few months ago because she was treating him just as badly as she treated me.

I think people can change, but it takes a lot more time and effort than most people are willing to put in.

Of course people are capable of change.

I also think that sometimes people have to take a good hard look at themselves after the loss of a relationship, and this can effect change.

My X was a total shit while we were married, unfaithful and rubbish. After we split he carried on making the same mistakes with women over and over again. Now he's met someone and he really has changed. He loves her and is scared of losing her I think.

But none of that really helps you does it Malteaser? I'm sorry to hear that you are still thinking of him and feeling pain. It will pass, I promise.