I know this is a wierd thing to say and I feel bad for even writing it....but I just seem to have lost that passion to rip my H clothes off and dtd...I love him, I love our family and I love the life we have built together so what the hell is wrong with me?
Has anyone else ever felt like this? I have spoken to him about how I feel but what can he do to change my perception of him!! Its not him is it...its me!
Our problems seemed to start when I was pg with our 1st child - my sex drive went through the roof and his was non existent. I kept asking if it was because I was pg and he would say no, he was tired/not in the mood etc It wasn't til after I had given birth and a few months after that actually that he finally admitted that it was because I was pg but by then the damage in my head had already been done. I just wish he had been honest with me from the start cos I spent my pg feeling so unattractive to my H. However, I did get some attention from a guy at work who I had always fancied but would never have dreamt that I would do anything about until he came on to me when I went back after maternity leave and I am ashamed to say we eventually slept together. It was amazing I'm not going to lie but now it seems the damage to my marriage is irreversable and I know I only have myself to blame. My H knows nothing about what I have done and thats the way I'm keeping it for the sake of our marriage and our kids (we now have 2). H ewas exactly the same with 2nd pg but at least I knew the reason. We are aware we have problems and have talked about going to relate but we are working through them.. Despite what you may think I do love my H and I never for one minute thought I would have had been unfaithful but that is the reality of my situation.
Thanks for listening x