Sorry title probably confusing.
Basically I went on my email today (which I haven't checked in months) and found two requests from my sister asking to meet up.
Basically the background is that I have no contact with my family (so parents/sister and as a result all extended family as well). ME and my sister have never got on or had any real realtionship though we are close in age. She still lives at home. The reason I have no contact with my family is because of my parents (controlling/abusive and all that that entails).
Also to further complicated matters I am visably pregnant and recently married - neither of which my family are aware of. The marriage thing I could hide but obviously not the pregnancy.
I also suspect this has probably been 'suggested' by my mother. I think/suspect that this is an attack on another front for them to get back into contact with me. I do not want contact with my parents at all. I do not trust them an inch. And they are very much the 'give them an inch and they will take a mile' kind of people. They also scare me a lot.
If I did meet my sister anything we discussed I assume would be fed straight back to my parents.
I have also recently been ill with extreme anxiety/stress and as a side effect of that, depression. I am now medicated but still undergoing treatment and waiting for another psyciatric (sp?) assessment and more treatment. So not doing particularly well atm (though much better than I was previously without treatment). Most of my problems are thought to stem from childhood and childhood abuse.
I haven't told dh yet that I have been emailed. But I know what his answer would be - i.e. he'll support me in whatever I want to do but thinks it'll be a bad idea.
I also want to tell my parents when the baby arrives that they have another grandchild and that I am married. But I'm not sure I actually want to meet up with them and am also scared they will try and find a way back in. Also I don't want ds (5yo) meeting them again as he keeps asking about them and I don't want to bring them in and out of his life - a) because of the risk to him and b) cos it is confusing for him.
I suppose what I am looking for is for people to tell me it is alright to ignore these messages (which were sent a while ago I just hadn't checked). And advice on what to do once baby is born.
I have nightmares about my family most nights - which I haven't told anyone about. I know they only ahve this much affect on me and control over me because I let them, but I can't break it - they absolutely terrify me.