am I being silly?

[bry84]

My husband had an affair three years ago when I was pregnant with our first daughter. I didnt find out until I was three months pregnant with our second daughter. Obviously I was heart broken but gave our marriage a second go because of the kids. I have grown to love him again but deep down know I will never truly trust him 100%

He is very attentive and always tells me he loves me, saying he will never stray again because of how much he nearly lost.

Last week my daughter started dance lessons which my husband takes her to. I noticed that he spoke a lot about her dance teacher (who is young and has a great body... as you expect from a dance teacher!) Anyway, whenever I mention her, he turns into a school boy with a school boy crush. He clearly fancies her. The problem is, I saw her for the first time this week and she is the spitting image of the work collegue he had an affair with.

I know there's nothing going on with the dance teacher but its really upset me as she looks so much like the OW. Am I being silly?!!!!!!!

No, perfectly normal considering the circumstances. You take her to dance classes not him in future.

No, of course you're not - these are your feelings and you can't help them. It's how you handle them that counts.

I suppose if it were me, I'd want to sit down with DH and have a chat about it. I'd ask him for a proper talk and then try and discuss what it is about that kind of woman that makes him go silly, and in that case why he was with me - and listen to his reasons. Because the fact is he married you, and had a baby with you, and no matter if he has a bit of a thing for skinny dance teachery types, it doesn't mean he would choose to spend his life with one.

It's probably the only way you will get any closure on it. But he has to be open and honest and willing to be able to set your mind at ease.

Yes, I have already decided to do that. It just makes me worry that he still fancies the women he had an affair with. Thanks x

Thanks Fliight, I am going to sit down with him tonight. I think a lot of it is my confidence. The ow was very pretty and very skinny. To be honest, I'm suprised she ever went with my husband, her boyfriend is very goodlooking. I just wish I had a body like the dance teacher but two kids have pretty much killed that!!!!