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Original poster

is he interested in me

44 replies

doigoforit · 21/04/2010 22:25

I got divorced about 5 yrs ago now and have been back in full time work since then.

I enjoy work and have plenty of friends,am popular and attractive but in my mid forties.

My question is this,I have met a younger man of about 35 at work who seems interested in me...but being older than him wonder if he just sees me as a friend,while I can see him as a potential love interest.

Does this seem like an enormous age difference to you?

How to find out and move this forwards without losing him as a friend?

OP posts:
Original poster
doigoforit · 12/05/2010 23:26

two things to say...

1/ I was unavailable 2 or 3 weeks ago and he kept following me round

2/today he passed me and my friend[younger than me very well dressed and quite glamorous]....and he flashed her this huge pearly smile ...not that he didn't smile at me but he gave her this big flash of teeth...

I felt sooo jealous ....b%£"&&d!!

I've gone off him now

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Original poster
doigoforit · 12/05/2010 23:28

so unavailable is my new theme

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SolidGoldBrass · 12/05/2010 23:53

TBH having read the whole thread it sounds more to me like neither of you is really bothered about dating each other, you have just been having a sort of office crush to brighten up the working day. Nothing wrong with that.

Original poster
doigoforit · 13/05/2010 20:07

he didn't say hello to me today!!

in a public meeting/lunch

I spoke to him,he sort of replied with no eye contact then went to sit somewhere else

have not a clue why

[he said hello to other people but not to me]

why on earth would he do that??

OP posts:
MunchkinsMumof2 · 13/05/2010 20:38

he sounds like a player tbh. Time to forget and move methinks.

Original poster
doigoforit · 13/05/2010 22:37

I'm not speaking to him again

thought we were friends !!

I am shy sometimes,that is the only thing it could have been on top of the blushing...

how very odd

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Original poster
doigoforit · 15/05/2010 10:33

he was moody with me again yesterday...did not look me in the eye....extremely peculiar...I have spoken to this man daily for months now

am not going to speak to him either atm

although tempted to ask in a week or two why he's behaving oddly????

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motherlovebone · 15/05/2010 10:41

possible someone told him you like him?

you may have accidentally scowled over the pearly friend smile thing

whatever it is, i would forget about him, doesnt sound suitable tbh.

Original poster
doigoforit · 15/05/2010 11:34

could anyone tell him if they didn't know...

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Original poster
doigoforit · 16/05/2010 08:16

I won't ignore,I will just not" be there" and make no effort
I'll see how many days I can avoid him for at least 2 weeeks I reckon

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rancidamoeba · 16/05/2010 08:35

Yes, I would say he sounds like a player. Best keep away. Call it a lucky escape.

CelticBanshee · 16/05/2010 08:59

Ah come on!!! You're too old for this school yard rubbish. We all are!

If he's ignoring you, he's not interested or has lost interest, just move on, get a mate to set you up with someone and go have fun, forget this loser.

Original poster
doigoforit · 16/05/2010 09:31

yeah...relationships are to feel good really aren't they

no matter how good looking they are it's not worth the hassle

OP posts:
CelticBanshee · 16/05/2010 09:41

It most certainly is NOT worth the hassle.

Also, you need a bloke with balls, this 'ickle' boy doesn't seem to have that - forget him!

doigoforit · 16/05/2010 10:29

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

CelticBanshee · 16/05/2010 10:51

He's morto because he was born ball-less, I'd blush too!

Honestly, I don't think I've analysed body language and blushing since I was in school, now that I'm a grown up, if I like someone - I ask them out (well, I'm in a long term relationship, but before that I mean )

Either ask him out or forget about him, stop the childish bullshit

I can see your work files now, scribbled on the front.. doigoforit + ball-less up a tree.. k-i-s-s-i-n-g..

Come on woman!!!!!

purplepeony · 16/05/2010 11:03

Look, just ask him out for a ocoffee/drink after work- make up any reason you like- but either do it or forget it.
If he is shy he will say yes,if he is not interested, he will say no.

You're too old for this second guessing "likes me,likes me not" rubbish.

imrubber · 16/05/2010 11:07

he isnt interested in you.
sorry. Harsh but true.

Dont waste time swooning over him. overthinking his every move/every word wondering what it might be.

If he was interested he would ask you out.

And im speaking as someone who wasted 9 months doing what you are doing now.

Interestingly, i got a male perspective on this the other day. Friend had been 'seeing' this girl for a year. He would never say she was his gf. He was not nice to her really put she put up with it and waited and then was hearbroken.

Few weeks later hes ' seeing' this new girl for all of 2 weeks and now, few weeks on and she is his gf.

I asked him why. Quite simply he didnt fall for the other girl.

Original poster
doigoforit · 17/05/2010 23:17

yeah..i'm over him...he was a bit boring anyway,you know long silences etc

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