DH acts like a dick when his mum is around.

[TheLeftFelanji]

My dh turns into a crazed chauvinist when MIL is around and starts bullying me. Why? I don't understand. He feels he has to show his mum who's the boss.

My dh acts like a wanker all the time.....

You'll probably never get to the bottom of this. It may well have its roots in things that happened between them in the dim and distant past. He may believe, rightly or wrongly, that she expects this behaviour from him.

As prh says, this is likely rooted in his childhood and/or adolescence. To be honest, the "why" is his business. The important thing for you is the effects of that bullying on you and your relationship with him.

I would consider sitting down with him and telling him that you don't care why he acts like a bully when his mum is around, just that you want him to stop doing it as it's not nice behaviour towards you.

If he does do it again then maybe a quiet "I will not stay here to be bullied by you" and then leave the room.

My DG is quite domineering in front of my MIL and she sometimes makes some joke saying - "ooh yes he can be quite nasty can't he" or "ooh he's just like his grandfather" (her father - someone else told me he was emotionally abusive to her mother because one of their children was born with SN).

As you can see I have issues with being assertive because I ignore both DH and MIL when this happens but the next time this scenario takes place I'm going to remind my MIL that she brought DH up, so its learned behaviour!

Mine reverts to behaving like a sullen teenager when his mother is around. It is very tedious.