My relationship with my mother has gone steadily downhhill since having my children. My older sister has always been Mum's favourite (and Mum doesn't hide it). My older sister has also always been jealous of me. My older sister is a drama queen always looking to put herself at the centre of Mum's world. She is 45 years old and has never really broken away from Mum. I am not sure my sister wants to and Mum doesn't want her too either. All rather odd, really.
Over the years I have been very hurt by my Mum's favouritism. Recently my sister has over-stepped the mark and got herself into an unbelievable mess. Mum is beside herself with worry. Out of an enormous sense of duty, I called Mum last week to offer support if she wanted to talk about things. She wanted to talk about my sister's situation. I offered her sound advice and she seemed genuinely grateful (my Dad died 20 years ago and my Mum appears to have no friends).
Last weekend I received a series of emails and texts from my sister that were abusive, vindictive and downright nasty. I found them deeply upsetting but did not sink so low as to respond. Mum had clearly gone back to my sister and said "Jenny says...." about everything we discussed. My Mum knew that this might/would fan the flames. I do not deserve this and was genuinely trying to offer some support to my Mum. Mum was worried sick.
My relationship with my sister is beyond saving, but now I can't be bothered with my Mum either. I have had so many years of my sister doing no wrong and me doing no right. I want to cut ties.... I want to stop trying to make everything right and focus on my own children...... but just feel sooooooooo guilty about cutting my mother out of my life. After all..... she is my Mother. I have never not rung her on Mother's Day. I can't bear the thought of speaking to her on Sunday though. I have not spoken to her since our conversation last week.