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Original poster

Would you find this revolthing....

51 replies

togoornot · 09/03/2010 14:07

Dh had stomach bug over the weekend. I was putting washing in the machine earlier and found his boxers with poo inside them, like he just hadn't wiped properly sorry if TMI.

We've has this discussion before about him wiping properly afterwards and he said hi thinks maybe a bit gets left beacuase he' very hairy. Things have been fine sincce the las discussion.

I just feel repulsed. AIBU?

I

OP posts:
Angeliz · 09/03/2010 14:39

Have just LOL'd at Alouiseg's post, had forgotten how funny mumsnet can be

OtterInaSkoda · 09/03/2010 14:46

I don't think I've ever dug a pair of DP's boxers from the linen basket, shitty or not. But then he does the bulk of the washing.

Agree it is minging. I'd be mightily fucked off.

Forthebestagain · 09/03/2010 15:26

Aww bless him. It is gross and yes he should be dealing with it, but if he is poorly can we not cut him some slack.

If its all the time then no, the dirty bugger needs to sort it out.

Original poster
togoornot · 09/03/2010 15:32

If this had just been a one off, i'd agree. But it's happened alot in the past. To the extent that when i bought him the pants, i thought to myslef maybe i should buy black so at least i wont see any marks! But gave him the benefit of the doubt as it hadn't happened for a while

OP posts:
OtterInaSkoda · 09/03/2010 15:34

But he's an adult, Forthebest! He should have dealt with his own shitty pants. Unless his dw regularly leaves her bloodied knickers for him to deal with - which I somehow doubt.

BogofFun · 09/03/2010 15:36

I would leave all his dirty underwear in the boxroom for him.

PandaEis · 09/03/2010 15:36

ahh poor guy!! he has had a stomach bug so may have had a bit of control-issue pooing happenning!

FWIW on a normal day to day basis i tell DH he has to wash his own undies or wipe his arse properly but if he was ill then i would maybe cut him some slack

put some rubber gloves on and lean away from the skiddies and wash them for him i say

YanknCock · 09/03/2010 15:49

Book him in for a crack wax. Then he'll have had an appropriately painful punishment, plus no hair for the shitty bits to get stuck to.

PandaEis · 09/03/2010 15:50

@ shitty bits

GetOrfMoiLand · 09/03/2010 15:51

Cut him some slack!

He has had the runs, not had his arms amputated. Wipe yer arse.

Original poster
togoornot · 09/03/2010 15:52

Have suggested the crack wax - he refused. Also refused to get his back waxed (

OP posts:
ASecretLemonadeDrinker · 09/03/2010 15:58

Cor you lot are harsh - I was really ill a few weeks back and kinda shat myself while being sick, rolled said undies up in my PJs to wash (was in a mobile caravan thing so no instant wash, had to walk to the laundrette thingy) and DH did the wash. Saying that, I wouldn't touch DHs knickers if they were shitty , esp. if he had wiping issues. Maybe he needs some andrex wet wipes? Is this a cling-on issue?

Timbachick · 09/03/2010 16:04

Love the crack wax option - do what I did when my dh refused to get his hair cut professionally - book it up and lie to him to get him there. They got him in the chair before he know what had hit him. Hopefully, the therapist will have him face down on the table before he can escape the salon??? Men are dogs really ... in fact, dogs are probably cleaner ... and don't wear boxers ....

barefootinthepark · 09/03/2010 16:07

This is really, really awful and terribly disrespectful.

He should have said, my pants are filthy I'll put them in the machine myself.

It is nobody's job to clean up another able adult's poo. This is going to sound really ratty but I would warn him, once more and I stop washing for you, and stick to that.

It's like leaving the loo pooey. Absolutely awful.

Have had to have words in the past with my entire family: dh and older dc. No matter that I'm an sahm, no matter that I do most everything else, I do not clean up poo unless I'm pretty much grovelled and apologised to and begged.

It's an issue of self respect for them as much as anything else.

gagamama · 09/03/2010 16:36

Sorry if TMI, but if he had been having explosive diarrhea and had been on and off the toilet constantly, that area can get very sore and stingy from constant wiping and runny burning shite. So maybe it just got too sore to wipe throroughly. Some baby wipes by the loo might help.

I would still find it revolting though.

SolidGoldBrass · 09/03/2010 16:37

WHile anyone can occaisonally stain a pair of pants (whether that's fart'n'follow through, leaky tampon trauma or just inadequate wiping) the polite thing to do is scrub said gusset yourself before adding to the washpile.

ilovesprouts · 09/03/2010 16:42

eek would have made him wash his self boak

Original poster
togoornot · 09/03/2010 16:46

This issue really has ruined my day - i'm not feeling well either as i now have the bug dh had.

I think once ds is in bed i'll give him th pants and tell him i never want to see his shitty pants again. If i do i'm no longer washing them and he can sleep in the spare bed. i don't wanto sleep with someone so filthy.

OP posts:
Original poster
togoornot · 09/03/2010 16:51

The first time this hapened we were on holiday. He got a bug and one morning i found shitty pants in our dirty washing. He tol me he'd had an accident while we were out the previous evening!! he sat through a meal in a restaurant with pooy pants and didn't tell me!!!

OP posts:
FanjolinaJolie · 09/03/2010 18:24

Well, if he's had the sh!ts from a tummy bug then I'd say it's probably an accident.

I'd bin the boxers as I don't think you need to be soaking and laundering them for him. He could do that.

Give him the option, ask him did you realise these pants were soiled and do you want to throw them out?

notquitenormal · 09/03/2010 20:38

If he's too hairy to wipe his arse properly I'd tell him to book himself in for wax.

Bet he'd up his game then.

MarshaMallow · 09/03/2010 21:17

Accident or not...in this house you clean up your own shittyness!

Not acceptable at all...he won't deal with his own poop but expects you to.......

I'd present him with shitty pants in a bag, some marigold gloves and a scrubbing/nail brush and say clean that up yourself!

Original poster
togoornot · 09/03/2010 23:08

I talked to him about it earlier. Showed him the carrier ga whch enclosd the said pants and told him what i'd found. Funnily enough he didn't want to see them. He siad it happend in the middle of the night, he woke up feeling dreadful and realised they were a bit "damp" so he took them off and put them in washing basket. I've told him in no circunstance do i want pooy pants in washing basket again. If i find them he can sort his own underwear washing.

Think he was a bit embarrassed and did apologise. He did, as expected try the whole "i'm ill" thing but i pointed out to him i'd had numerous stomach upsets and never put my shitty underwear in washing for him to deal with. Hopefully it's sunk in

OP posts:
hatesponge · 09/03/2010 23:21

How strange. I spent 8 years with my Ex, and it honestly never occurred to me during that time to refuse to wash his pants (Ex frequently experienced the fart/slight follow through scenario) I just did it, albeit unwillingly.

Must remember when I eventually find a new man, that I should not be expected to wash his poo-y undergarments!

ItsGraceAgain · 09/03/2010 23:33

What amazes me is the lack of an "Oh no, look what's happened to my pants, better wash 'em out in the sink" response. That's what I do (or, if really poorly, put them in the shower & run it for a while. TMI but practical.)

Some friends of mine had a flatmate, who left her pooey and/or bloody knickers in the bathroom EVERY DAY. So it's not just blokes.