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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

have the most stupid crush.....

27 replies

hugecrush · 03/03/2010 21:24

on my boss at work, and feel like I am about 14.

He is very physically attractive, but also witty, entertaining, and gets on with everyone.

More than all of this is the fact he is absolutely great at his job. I have spent over 10 years with a series of bosses who have been anything from belligerent to ineffectual, and have never worked for anyone who has the same sort of ideas as me as to how to do what we do effectively. I've worked alongside people at the same sort of level as me who agreed with me in the past, but we've always been battling again the ineffectual and belligerent managers mentioned earlier. To actually have someone manage me who agrees with me, shares my work goals, is wonderful.

If he was this good at his job but no oil painting, it would be fine. I would respect him, enjoy being in his team, and no other thoughts would trouble me. If he was all looks and no substance, well he would be something pretty to look at, but no more.

The trouble is he's the whole package. It's not affecting my work really, actually I am probably working harder than ever because I want to impress him, I want him to appreciate my skills, and hard work. However, I do find myself thinking about him an awful lot more than I should. And that any guy I meet in real life is nothing in comparison to him!

There's nothing between us other than some very mild office flirtation. He is married, and though I may be single, I wouldnt go there for that reason (not in any event that he would ever consider me!).

I'm not really sure what I'm asking - that grown women do get crushes like this I guess; and also whether I just have to let it run it's course (and how long this will take) or if it will just fade in time?

OP posts:
yousaidit · 03/03/2010 21:31

Oh gawd, i have an uber-crush at the moment on someone. Luckily, he doesn't really know me and i don't see him, he is a tradesman we've had to use, so i could break something and call him round

my idea is over think the crush so it gets so boring it will run its course! Not working yet though, i've gogled him and found his address and googled earth-ed his house!

yes, grown women get them, and there isn't a magic answer: you can't have anythimng happen then rewind time and retend it didn't! Bgger, eh?

Shoppingveggie · 03/03/2010 21:36

Your comments have made me feel much better! I have got a bit of a crush on an actor who is currently playing in the West End - we went to see the show a couple of weeks ago, he was brilliant. I have since googled him, followed him on twitter and keep playing you tube footage

I really should be getting on with the housework!!

hugecrush · 03/03/2010 21:46

So glad I'm not alone in this!

I tried to think of his faults, couldn't come up with any, and then found myself just thinking about him!

Haven't got to the stage of google-earthing his house yet, so maybe this crush still has a while to run!

OP posts:
Shoppingveggie · 03/03/2010 21:49

Ask me who he is.... as mine is the only one at the moment we can name..... go on ... I want to talk about him

hugecrush · 03/03/2010 21:53

Ok, tell us all - who is your famous crush?!

OP posts:
yousaidit · 03/03/2010 21:55

ooh, go on, who is he?

yousaidit · 03/03/2010 21:56

But i want some one to know my crush and tell me how much he pines for me and wants to whisk me away and stuff

jenduff · 03/03/2010 21:58

Tell us tell us shoppingveggie

And OP enjoy your crush but see it for what it is

Shoppingveggie · 03/03/2010 21:58

OK.... from Priscilla Queen of the Desert - Oliver Thornton (hot sweat!)

Shoppingveggie · 03/03/2010 21:59

If you saw Let's Dance on Saturday he was the one in yellow!

Shoppingveggie · 03/03/2010 22:02

He plays Adam (Felica when in drag) in the show - I did find it quite worrying that I fancied a man wearing a pink bikini - but from the look on the all the women's faces in the front row - we all felt the same!

yousaidit · 03/03/2010 22:03

Yes, but when you both get married what will he wear then? and what will your wedding dress look like?

Minshu · 03/03/2010 22:10

Sorry to butt in - I had an uber crush on my boss at work years ago. Dismissed it as a passing fancy, but it didn't pass. Fast forward several years (and all sorts of ups and downs in our professional and personal lives), and he's now my DP and our baby DD is snuggled in her cot upstairs - ahh...

hugecrush · 03/03/2010 22:18

Minshu - what a happy ending! - thats so lovely

Can't see it happening in my case however, nice though it might be to imagine!

OP posts:
yousaidit · 03/03/2010 22:18

yay minshu! congrats on catching your crush! Hmm... wonder when i'm going to snare mine?

said · 03/03/2010 22:19

lol at google-earthing your crush. I can scare myself at my (non-malicious)stalker abilities. Frightening how much info is so instantly here and gettable

outofmysystem · 03/03/2010 22:27

glad we are all suffering similar crush afflictions ~ spring must be in the air

about two weeks ago I could only look at my chosen one's mouth for hours while trying to remember how to speak

hugecrush · 03/03/2010 22:30

It is truly scary what you can find out on the net! I managed to find an Ex's entire family once - parent's address, sister's wedding photos, brother's work contact details, the list goes on

PS - Am not a scary stalker, and none of the info I obtained was ever used for anything nasty - honest

OP posts:
yousaidit · 03/03/2010 22:35

I sent my crush a very very very anonymous valentine day card, not an ounce of filth in it, just a oooooooooh how lovely are you? sort of card. I was palpitating when i posted it

hugecrush · 03/03/2010 22:37

Outofmysystem - When my boss speaks to me he always looks me straight in the eye; I manage a couple of minutes seconds of this then have to look away failing which I also lose the power of coherent speech

OP posts:
outofmysystem · 03/03/2010 22:50

lol

I know just what you mean hugecrush

We were looking each other in the eye but it was so intense I kept having to look away/collapse in a heap.

The not being able to speak was slightly inconvenient at work as well lol.

Fun though,in an exhausting kind of way.

hugecrush · 03/03/2010 22:56

So true outofmysystem! I do find it all tiring sometimes, the sheer effort of behaving normally!

We were in a presentation yesterday which was going on a bit - I happened to catch his eye and he was rolling his eyes, like he was exactly as bored as I felt. Had to try VERY hard not to giggle like a schoolgirl.

And as for when he winks at me

I really am INCREDIBLY sad!

OP posts:
outofmysystem · 03/03/2010 23:02

yes I also have the giggles and feel very hot most of the time

Minshu · 04/03/2010 16:32

That's just how things used to be with me and DP... Not so often now, as the stench of baby vomit kind of dampens things...

yousaidit · 04/03/2010 22:10

Well, my crush wasn't home at 5:30 today when i detoured past his house completely out of my way-- on my home . when we are married i shall chastise him for being late home for tea.