Just seen my Ex H's girlfriend on Facebook.......

[Worldturnedupsidedown]

and it made me feel sick.....

We split up last April...well he decided that he did'nt want to be with me anymore and very quickly got with someone else.

Well he has paraded her infront of my dc and his family. Even taking her on a family holiday at Christmas that I was supposed to have gone on....and SHE took my place....nice!!!

I had been told that he had photos of her on his profile and she even has photos of him and her AND my ds on hers!! But I have never been able to bring myself to look at her and see what she looked like.

I feel I am getting on with it..well desperately going through the motions; going out...meeting new men...even dating someone at the moment...and then I see the picture. She looks really plain...normal looking...I imagined her to be some glamour puss...but it made my stomach lurch as she was with MY man and they looked happy together.

I feel angry about it all as I think I've been replaced. I know it is going to take time to get over......it is so crap though...everything is fantastic in his world and seems like shit in mine.

NO,NO,NO!

he'll soon be finding out her faults,and her his too. it wont be that rosy in their garden for long...

Please dont look - it doesn't help

I know curiosity does get the better of you - I have done the same thing and was surprised by how plain she looked. I think you build up these women that you feel in competition with. You think that they must look like a super model and always be glamourous but, do you know what? They are just women. Like you and me.

So sorry this has upset you. You sound like you are still hurting. Just imagine that she has a wig, and a false eye and a false leg and when she takes all that off - well, you get the picture

Yes I think I am still hurting....I hate him...I still love him....I am strong and weak at the same time...

Maybe if I could feel like I had the upper hand for just one minute, instead of this horrible feeling; then maybe I might feel a tiny bit better..

Worldturnedupsidedown-dont know what to say about that really other than I feel for you.
Insensitive of him x

Take care of yourself,don't look at FB.Sounds like you are really hurting.

One day you will feel like you have the upper hand worldturned, because one day you will see him or her and feel nothing. It does take a while though.

Time does heal - not totally - but enough to get on with your life

Worldturnedupsidedown I am sorry for what you're going through... we women are sometimes our own worst enemies and can't stop doing things that hurt ourselves. I know how difficult (almost impossible!) is not to be tempted to look, isn't it? And even when it does hurt us, we go back again and have another glimpse, in case the first one had not bee enough .

My only advice is, try to get away from the house and the computer for as long as you can. Go out even if you don't feel like. Meet people even if you think they could be boring. Accept invitations even if you believe you won't have fun. Everything is better than staying home feeling sorry for yourself.

I hope time goes fast and son you find yourself laughing at how silly you were for ever looking at him, and truly sorry for his new GF. Best of luck!

Thanks for all your good words...

'She' even pulls up in her car outside my house and picks up my daughter with my shitehawk of an ex!!!! The audacity of it all...It takes all my willpower not to go out and drag her ass out of her car and smash her head in!!!! Sorry I'm not a violent person, but they make me sooooooo mad.

It's ok to have homocidal thoughts as long as you don't act on them

I completely understand your feelings, but they met after you split up.

I think you have a long way to go, and 10 months on, perhaps its time to find another way of dealing with things?

I'm sorry if its not what you want to hear, but this level of hatred for someone you've never met and who will be caring for your DD is misplaced.

If he cheated on her with you, maybe, but he didn't and you need to deal with the fact he moved on. Even if you aren't ready to move on yourself, you need to find a way of coping. She is caring for your DD with him, and this level of hatred for a stranger who is part of your childs life can't be good for anyone.

Sorry again.

Well thats just it...they did'nt meet after we split up. There was certainly 'things' going on while we were together and I know that for a fact....so you can imagine how it may affect my feelings towards her and of course him...