Thank you thank you thank you! I started reading it last night, and read half of it in one go. I knew that there was something completely amiss with the way I was raised, but was told by my DM that no, I was wrong, I had a wonderful childhood. The closest thing I had read/heard of before was the Virgin Suicides, which obviously isn't the most positive message, but at least it was something I could relate to.
I haven't got to the point yet where it says why parents control, but I am starting to have some ideas as to why my DM did/does what she does. Have also recommended it to a friend who had a similar upbringing, and will also recommend to my siblings.
In particular, it helped make it clear why I struggle to make friends and trust people; my confidence was shattered at home, while at the same time, my DM controlled my social life - she decided who was suitable as a friend (actually telling someone to become my friend when I moved to a new school, as she thought this girl was nice and sensible and suitable), wouldn't let me go out without supervision (well into my teens) and so on.
Thank you again; you have no idea what this means to me.