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Relationships
Difficult sex....Help
Yorksmum · 12/06/2003 01:56
I am a new member to mumsnet but I have read many of the conversations and found them to be very helpful.
I have decided to post a message to see if anyone can help me with a problem I am experiencing. I gave birth to my DS in April and he was quite large at 9lb 10oz!! It was a difficult birth and it subsequently involved requiring stiches.
My DP and I recently tried to resume full sex but I am finding it very painful. My DP is understandably concerned for me and reluctant to continue trying, but I am feeling very frustrated!! We have tried a few positions, but to no avail.
Have any other mums experienced similar problems (I guess most have!) and what positions worked best for you?
Thanks in advance from two very frustrated parents!!
alibubbles · 12/06/2003 10:07
Don't be too anxious about it hurting, you'll tense up and find it hard to realx, so it will hurt then, because you think it will.
Mine were 9.8 and 9.12 and had no problems, resumed after only two weeks.
RELAX, RELAX, most important and then it will be fine!
Gillam · 12/06/2003 10:22
I think after mine we resumed after a very short time too. But yes I definately agreed with the relaxing down. If you think something will hurt it sure will, so do try to relax. May be don't try full sex just yet, just try forplay for a while and then one thing may lead to another and you should be relax and ready.
Bobsmum · 12/06/2003 12:30
Yorksmum - after a long and difficult delivery and loads of intervention (emg - c-section) dh and I had a few problems too and I was constantly in tears with the pain of trying. After repeatedly going to my GP for about 3 months, he referred me to a dermatologist. She said that my nerve endings had been badly damaged during my delivery (too many medical instruments etc) and diagnosed vulval vestibulitis. Basically 7 months, some local anaesthetic and loads of aqueous cream later everything was back to normal and so much better, but it was a real problem that wouldn't go away.
If your pain persists go and see your GP. I was misdiaognosed as having thrush to begin with, having mow read up on my condition, the one thing that makes the pain worse is canesten - it's too strong.
Gillam · 12/06/2003 12:52
If you read back over the messages on this thread you will only see that alibubbles mentions her kids were 9.8 and 9.12 ( i take it she was refering to the weights??) Maybe it is me but I cannot see a message where she has said her kids were only 12 months apart.
Maybe you could read back and see if I am missing something? I have read back loads of times to see but cannot find the 12months apart business!!
It is nothing against you M2T i have just gotton a bit confused and lost somewhere along the line!
May be it is the message where alibubbles has asked you why you think she only has 12 months between the ds and dd?
prufrock · 12/06/2003 13:18
Gillam -you are not mad it confused me to.
The 10.44am message was not asking why M2T presumed alibubbles had only 12 months between kids but a rhetorical question referencing the fact that the quick resumption of sexual activity in the alibubbles house had led to a short gap between children.
alibubbles · 12/06/2003 22:09
OOps, I caused a bit of confusion! Sorry !
M2T made a comment that I was insatiable as I had only waited two weeks to resume having sex ( more like 10 days!) Yes, we couldn't wait and that is why there is only a 12 month gap between my children.
I must be very fertile as well, as I was sterilised when DS was 6 months old and fell pregnant 10 weeks after that!
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