DH has signed up to a number of online dating websites

[gemmummy]

looking for no strings attatched sex. I found one once b4 about 18 months ago, he swore it was curiosity and now i have discovered 2 or 3 more. I confronted him about one and he swore that it was just stupidity but i have found emails too trying to arrange a meet. I'm gutted.

lol, no chance of that anyfucker, i've brought the laptop with me to mums. Bella, you're right, it was so easy for me to find this stuff, it was as if he wanted to be caught.

good girl gem, I like your style !

maybe he did want to get caught..who knows

If he wanted to get caught, it would be because he wanted the OP to weep a bit, then forgive him and thereby demonstrate to him that he can do what he likes and be forgiven for it as long as he says he's sorry enough times. (not a catholic by any chance is he?)

While I do think that it's possible (and probably the best thing) to be able to forgive a drunken lapse at a party or somesuch, the deliberate signing up to websites and emailing potential other partners show someone who is making a conscious choice not to be monogamous. Who doesn't really want to be monogamous and probably thinks that 'men have extra needs' and that it's OK to have the little woman at home looking after everything while he does exactly what he likes and thinks a bunch or two of flowers will make up for it the next day.

DOn't put up with it if it's not acceptable to you. There are other men out there with a different outlook.

just saw this thread. My ex dh used to do this all the time. Im sure ive heard every excuse there is:

• his mates set it up as a joke
• it was old from before we met ( not sure such sights existed then.. and he didnt have a pc to get on internet anyway)
• he wsa just looking as a joke to pass the time as he was bored

and possibly, the best excuse. he was looking for a woman to have sex with us as a 3sum.and that i should be pleased he was doing this not angry as he was being unselfish.
sadly, i am not kidding about that last excuse. ANd, if you asked him today, id bet he would still say it.

Bottom line, in my experience. If hes doing this, he will always be doing it. Some men change, the majority dont. I spent almost a whole 8 year marriage ( i think he was faithful for about 3 months) trying to hold everything together, chosing to believe him.

I was worth more than that, expect it took me 8 years to realise that. YOU ARE WORTH MORE THAN THAT.