er, i am 40, and 5 months ago met a lovely man, who is 30. I have a 3yo DS who spends 3 nights a week at his dad's.
It's all been going brilliantly with lovely man, we get on SO well, but he has recently been having health issues and has been told by a heart specialist (that's how bad it's been) that's it's all down to stress.
He has talked to me about how freaked out he is that i've had this whole 'previous life' and that he feels an acute pressure in our relationship because of my age (he really wants kids) - we've been taking it slowly and he has only met DS briefly a couple of times. He has no experience with kids and was petrified, but it went well. Usually I go to stay at his place when DS is at his dad's.
I am getting frustrated that the relationship isn't moving on and i feel like i am living two lives - one with him in town and one with DS in the country (an hour away). At the same time i don't want to rush into anything.
He thinks that our relationship is a contributing factor to the stress, as he has never even been in love before and now suddenly he is, and it's with someone with so much baggage... but he says the thought of being without me is worse than the stress he is experiencing.
Everyone keeps saying if we love each other enough it will work itself out, and he keeps saying it will all work out in the end, but i can't help thinking i should just knock it on the head now and get on with finding someone more suitable (i.e. my age with own kids).
I do feel that i want to get on with it, i want a family, not just a boyfriend... am i being my own worst enemy? i am not really expressing this to him as i don't want to scare the life out of him, but he's a clever boy and is aware of the pressure that my age puts on us and what that means.
Anyone had a similar situation that's worked out well??? i don't know what to do for the best.