my high sex drive, why is hubby's so low?!

[missytequila]

I adore sex and want it all the time. But I feel like the 'man' in my marriage, as my hubby is the one 'too stressed, too tired, not in the mood'...

I dont know what to do. When i ask him about it, he says he is too stressed about work/money and that it is not because he doesnt fancy me and that i should not pressure him. He also laughs if I try sexy lingerie...

Now I am pregnant and its even worse, he just wants to cuddle and i am so 'in the mood' its crazy.

Does anyone have experience with this? PS- I am 100% sure he is not having an affair, and I do have vibrating toys.... but i want to be intimate with him....

Libido mismatch is not a gender issue. Basically, the way to look at this is not that either of you is wrong, oversexed or undersexed, but that the problem is with the relationship. You will have got into the classic 'vicious circle' whereby the more he doesn;t want sex, the more desperate you become to have sex, and the more you hint, and ask nicely, and beg even, the more reluctant he becomes to engage in sex.
You will need to have a proper talk with him and agree on some compromising ie so many nights a week you will not ask for or initiate sex, but he is free to do so, and the other nights, you are free to ask for sex but he does not have to agree. That takes some of the pressure off and may help.

Is the baby your first? He might feel odd having sex with you when you have a baby inside you?

yes first baby. I realise that could have a little to do with it... but to be honest he has been the less randy one ever since the economy and his business has gone bad.

Hi,
i need advice. how often a week should someone be having sex. My hubby has declared today that he no longer thinks of me in the same way he did beefore our 2 kids (age 4, 5) and that I do not have enough sex with him. to be fair he is right in that we have seex maybe 2 times in the last month. is there a minimum as i find with exhaushtion i count be bothered. add to that he never helps me with anything as he in his own word 'works'. heelp. i just wrote up 2 pages of things to do to improve this - internet based.

the only normal amount to have sex a week is what makes both of you satisfied. my problem is the other way around, i want it 5x a week and am not happy he does not and is exhausted like you....

I think if you are generally exhausted, ok... but if you are just a bit tired and stressed, sex can really help. The deal should be whoever wants it more has to do more of the work. If you are not so motivated and he is, more the reason he can 'work for it'...he can get out the massage oil, you get naked and he can turn a back rub into something more...trust me you will sleep better than ever!

SNowOwl: tell him that men who do their fair share of domestic work and childcare get more and better sex than lazy sods who do nothing and expect their wives to service them domestically and sexually.
Because it's true.