Ideas for meeting other couples (friends)- clubs/classes?

[danpige]

Hi

I'm new to Mumsnet so bear with me if I get it all wrong!

So here is the problem. DH and I have been married for 12 years. We have never had a huge amount of friends but in the last few years we seem to have less and less. People have moved away, lost touch or just don't seem that interested anymore. I have a few more 'girlfriends' who I see duirng the day, but none of them seem to be that interested in extending this to be friends with us as a couple. I'm not sure if my DH is that bothered but I am. I need to socialise. We had a real 'crisis' before xmas, our only Christmas social event was cancelled by our friends at very short notice and we/I realised that there was just noone else to ask. I have quite a low confirdence regarding friends as I feel that everyone else have loads of friends and I don't feel I have. Some of it is in my head I know but some of it is the case as people rarely phone me/ rarely suggest meeting ect. I do my best to be socialble and do have a few friends/acquaintances.
My DH and I have discussed that it might help if we do something together to meet new people. But where? We both like live music but the main music place nearby is full of teenages and quite loud so not really a good place. We like eating out and travel otherwise we don't really have any hobbies together. We are not really big drinkers so pubs seem a bit pointless.
Anybody else have the same problems or ideas?
Thanks

Welcome to MN danpige
any ideas here?

Could you check out if there's any restaurants near you that do tastings/cooking lessons in the evenings? There's one near me and seems like quite a few couples go there together.

Was going to say wine tasting courses too but then saw you're not big drinkers, are you?

Thanks domesticslattern, i did see that post and do take the advice on board. Funny enough i'm Danish but despite living in the area for years I have never really settled friends wise.

Thanks Doozle I have never heard of resturant doing cooking, sounds fab, I will look out for it. Wine tasting, not sure of DH would like that.

Danpige - this really struck a chord with me. Sometimes it can seem like the whole world has a group of chums or family on the doorstep and I feel inadequate that I do not. Whilst snowed in I've been watching 'wanted down under' and in all three episodes the couples have had loads of family and friends a stones throw away and have never had to make friends anew. As someone else has said, I feel like I've lost friends from earlier periods of my life due to time and re-locating. I have been to a few clubs and the like in the last few years and although I've enjoyed the activity it's mainly (much) older people who go - I'm not ageist in my friendship choices and the people have been perfectly pleasant but not a source of new friendship. Mind you, when I was early twenties the club route did work for me in a new city as that's where I met DP! I haven't done the NCT thing as I don't yet have children - another factor that makes me feel like an oddity for my age. I have people who I am friendly with at work and talk to, have lunch and teas with but no one lives near me and they all have family commitments so although I enjoy their company it's not quite enough.

Domesticslattern - I admire your honesty and your list! How did your plans pan out? I'm toying with the book group idea but I'm scared

Ballroom dancing?

Worked for some friends of ours.....

church?

I was going to suggest some sort of dancing - salsa or jive classes maybe.

I'd do it myself but DH has no sense of rhythm and when we went to ceroc classes years ago I used to end up storming off the dance floor!

< intolerant cow emoticon >

Or is there a film club or choral society you could join?

Thanks for the great suggestion. OurLadyOfPerpetualSupper I'm the one with no rhythm so I don't think any dancing would work for us. DH has talked about getting a motorbike and joining a motorbike club, I'm really not sure! Never been on a bike in my life and not a great way to travel with 2 kids.

College evening classes? Pub quiz nights? Darts league?

Dont feel you are alone, I am Billy no mates, we only have 1 couple we are friendly with, and not that close now so, we are on the lonely boat too

Hi, danpige. Do you have pre-school chidren? I found mine a great help in making freinds. I would first make freinds with the mums, then invite the whole family round to a BBQ, and the blokes would just have to get along with each other.