My parents again, when will this stuff cease to bother me?

[Isawlissiekissingsantaclaus]

Have been trying to organise all sets of parents for Christmas. PIL and dad/SM have been v accommodating and keen to see ds, especially since we will be moving away when DH has passed all his RAF stuff.

however mum and SD have been fobbing me off. been v non-committal about dates/times etc because DB and his DF will be there Christmas day and possibly boxing day. been a bit put out by it but not surprised. have always come poor third behind DB's but since DS was born they have been a bit better.

just called for a definitive answer and found out from DB that they have organised a family get together on boxing day, cousins, DB's DF's family... the whole shebang. not us! i know that i am not the daughter they wanted, but ds is their grandson ffs

oh, but they can pop in for half an hour to see ds on boxing day if they have time

That's really horrid of your mum/SD. Don't put yourself out for them, stop trying to pin them down to dates and enjoy spending xmas with the people who want to be with you - your DH, DS, DF and SM and PIL.

Invite yourself to the party?

Sod em
They are being very unkind.
Enjoy your Christmas with those who seem to appreciate you a bit more.
I wish I had something sensible to say to help the hurt this must cause.

i wish i could say i didnt care, but it breaks my heart for ds. still, this time next year we will be on a RAF base somewhere and wont feel obliged to make the effort.

its their loss!

Try to stop caring.
Hard, I know.
Your Mum doesn´t deserve to be a grandmother.
And your son has two sets of grandparents.
If she´s not interested, you can´t make her be & you will only get upset everytime she lets you down again.

Why try to force a relationship with her?