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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Original poster

Can they take my DD if I cant cope

23 replies

canonlytakesomuchmore · 12/12/2009 13:15

I just called NHS for someone to call me as I am feeling really depressed as cannot deal with it all anymore. its after 1pm and I am sat in bed crying and its not fair on her and for once today she is not clingy and playing on my own.

But I can hardly get up for myself to eat or think. I have a banging headache and just feel the world is closing down on me. PLEASE HELP

OP posts:

inzidoodle · 12/12/2009 13:17

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LynetteScavo · 12/12/2009 13:21

How old is your DD?

Is there anyone at all who could ahve her for today?

girlsyearapart · 12/12/2009 13:28

where are you? someone local may be able to help? will she sit and watch tv with you?

Original poster

canonlytakesomuchmore · 12/12/2009 13:40

she is 2. And I am in Witney. And no noone around to help

OP posts:

prettyfly1 · 12/12/2009 13:42

ok - there is nothing I can advise for today but can you look up if there is a homestart in your area. They arent social services - they are a charity and will give you support in your home to get better. Have you seen your gp about some support and maybe some antidepressants to get you through?

fattybumbum · 12/12/2009 14:08

Can you put on a dvd for your child and just have a rest to give yourself a break? Call the samaritans and see if they can point you in the right direction. You are not alone. There will be brighter times ahead, you just can't see it now. Ring the samaritans NOW and don't do anything stupid. Come back on here if you need to and keep talking.

fattybumbum · 12/12/2009 14:10

Somone once said to me that when things are really hard it's because you are tired. Don't know what else is going on in your life but it may be that you are exhausted. Also if you have a headache then that is extra stress on top. Hope you are ok.

MarjoryMoores · 12/12/2009 14:16

Here is your local HomeStart Give them a call on monday and they will try and match you with a volunteer who'll be able to give you some support be that space to play with your dd or just someone to talk to that won't judge you. All teh volunteers have been really well trained and have a good understanding of depression etc.

Hope that helps?

Is there a little playground near by that you could go to for half an hour? Then you'd both get some fresh air and you'd feel like you'd done something for your dd so wouldn't feel so guilty about having a low morning?

LynetteScavo · 12/12/2009 21:10

How are you now?

Original poster

canonlytakesomuchmore · 13/12/2009 01:29

still feeling the same, her dad finally came to get her at 6pm. and yes I am tired, I cant sleep at night.

I am trying to work on an assignment that is due on Monday and cant concentrate on that.

Saw an after hours doc and he suggested I wait until Monday and speak to my doc re: antidepressants.

Spoke to the Samaritan organisation earlier and feel slightly better but have a banging headache that dont want to go away.

I see images of what my husband did with this OW in my head and cant seem to shake it. I then am upset that my DD has to live with our mistakes. Therefore just loads happening at the same time. Has been since August different things happening and right now its like my world is coming crashing down.

Our wedding anniversary is 23rd and his bday 24th and its maybe just the time of year on top of what has happened.

OP posts:

girlsyearapart · 13/12/2009 06:05

How are things this morning?

nursenight · 13/12/2009 06:56

Tell us some more about what has happened to you, get it off your chest, it might help. Have you got any friends around who can help?

RumourOfAHurricane · 13/12/2009 08:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

humblemum · 13/12/2009 20:41

Ive only just seen this thread, but im only about 20miles from you, so can i help? Please let me know. Sorry you are feeling so down.

Original poster

canonlytakesomuchmore · 14/12/2009 20:33

Hi
Thanks Shiny & humblemum.
Still not 100% but at least no longer crying. Saw my GP today and he gave me a dose of 2 weeks anti-depressants.

Could not even go to college today to do my presentation and hand in my assignment.

OP posts:

MarjoryMoores · 15/12/2009 08:20

seriously - please give homestart a call - they'll really be able to help

girlafraid · 15/12/2009 08:43

how are you canonly? Please let us know how you are, a lot of people are thinking of you

morningpaper · 15/12/2009 08:54

Could you ring your local branch of Mind and ask for some advice? Perhaps ask for someone to talk to you about practical steps to improving life on the day-to-day? E.g. committing to 1. Eating properly three times a day 2. Getting exercise once a day 3. Getting a routine in place that you will follow each day, even if you don't want to 4. Going to bed at exactly the same time each night, read for 30 minutes, then lights off. These sort of steps will IMPROVE YOUR LIFE DRASTICALLY. They won't change your situation but they will improve your state of mind and you need to prioritise that for your daughter's sake. She is more important than all of this. Could you commit yourself to those things? You really need someone to support you and provide encouragement.

humblemum · 15/12/2009 09:40

how are you today? please let me know if there is anything shiny and I can do as we are so close to you.

RumourOfAHurricane · 15/12/2009 10:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

chocolaterabbit · 15/12/2009 10:18

I'm also very near by and have a 2.5 yo DD. Am happy to chat/ help/ whatever. How are you feeling today?

NeedCoffee · 13/01/2010 22:21

Canonly-they wont take DD off you, you're going through a shitty time at the minute and need support. Does DD go to nursery whilst you're studying? Could they have her for an extra few hours a week. Homestart should help too.

Mainly posting to say you are not alone and people are here if you need/want them to help

Dalrymps · 13/01/2010 22:54

Hey canonly, just wanted to add my support. I wish I loved closer so I could help practically. You've been through a lot, give yourself time for the dust to settle.

None of this is your fault, not what your H did and not the depression. You are doing the best you can and the fact you care about your DD enough to post asking advice about the whole thing shows what a great mum you are

It's gonna take time to feel better but the first step is getting on those antidepressants and asking for as much help as you can. You will start to feel better but for the moment just concentrate on getting through each day and don't be hard on yourself, you're doing great.

Keep posting, you will find a lot of support here, we are all your friends x x x

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