We have two young children, a 3.5 yr old dd and 2 yr old ds. 3.5 y old has a disability.
We have no outside help, no one who really cares or wants to be around our little family so we are pretty isolated and alone. I stay at home and care for the kids, H goes out to work.
The problem is, when he gets home at night the kids ( natually imo) want him. I might add that they are bathed and ready for bed when he gts in so all he needs to actually do is take them upstairs and read a story and give them a cuddle etc..... now because they dont see him that much and always see me, they want him. If ( and when in dd case) they wake up in the night he is the one they want. We always used to share this when they were tiny and I did more than my fair share of night care as he could not stay awake, but now as its not that regular occurance and they want him I dont see the harm in letting him go to them.
But he does, he thinks Im a lazy stupid cow ( alond with expletives and infront of the kids) for not wanting to get out of bed and tend to my children constantly. When do I get a break if he does not care for them ( if neccesay at night) sometimes they can be shouting at me all day and I just cant take anymore by night. Is it too much too expect H to care fo them at night?
I understand he is tired but he stays up so late anyway then watches films on his phone in bed and Im just so cross that he thinks his role as being a dad does not invovle any of the hard stuff.
I am pepared for people to say Im in the wong, but I dont think I am ( totally) and just wondered what the hell I do to make hime see that he needs to do more of the hard bits. He is like it at the weekend as well, I take a backseat from full on parenting ( but am obviously still there running around doing everything to make the bits he does do easy) but apparently he feels Im getting to much time off and a chance to relax and he is not.
I must add that if at any time the kids need or ask for me, that of course I go.
Arrghhhh I feel such resentment!!!!
Please help.