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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Really confused - advice needed!!!

29 replies

AnotherHelen · 09/06/2005 15:41

My dp 'told me' on tuesday evening that he was going to a bbq at his friends house on saturday afternoon and will probably go on til the early hours this upset me as he is always going to parties or celebrations without me! i get on well with his boss' wife Linda and this bbq on saturday is at a friend from works house - so i dont know him and dp says its a 'lad' thing anyway - which is fine but Linda has said since then that she and her husband are going and everyone at dp's work is going and taking there partners/wife so why is it that i dont get to go?? he has done this sooo many times before he even ditched me last minute on new years eve a couple of years ago saying i was making him go out partying when he didnt want to and he left me on my own on new years i then found out 2 days later that he went straight out with his friend Rich to a girl we both knows new years party - i didnt even know about this party let alone get invited - i felt so angry and sad about it!! i still do! did my friend think i knew and just didnt bother going? he must be ashamed of being with me or something! i dont know how to getto the bottom of this! my other friend and her dp have just been here and he said he would never go anywhere without michelle being with him! - so why does my dp do it - all the time?? is it me??? im so depressed about it! sorry for such a long one - just really need some help with this, what do i do?? xxx

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ScrewballMuppet · 10/06/2005 16:30

You come across as really nice you don't deserve someone treating you like that. MAybe a stay at your mums is what you need, might make him realise and bring him to his senses or he might be exactlty the same or petty (in which case you may be better off calling it a day)

AnotherHelen · 10/06/2005 16:49

Thanks SM! i agree with happydaddy too! i think i might well go out! im very tempted to stay at my mums house for a while too! - i never thought of doing that! i dont think i could be without my 2 little ones though and i guess if i took them with me it would defeat the purpose somewhat (there's just no helping me is there! ) as for not cooking and doing his laundry anymore, great idea! im such a dozey mare - why cant i think of doing these things? no wonder he gets away with bloody murder! - Arsehole!! - (well put HD!) xxx

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ScrewballMuppet · 10/06/2005 21:06

take the kids with you to your mums have someone look after you for a change and help with the kids even if its for a short whil although don't tell him that just say your going and repeat calmly what you've already told him. Thats just my opinion you've got to do whats right for you and that might not be it.

keep smiling

AnotherHelen · 11/06/2005 09:55

Thanks SM! im off to my mums to pick up ds1 so i may stay! my sister is there with her new baby right now also so even more reason to stay a while! thanks so much for all advice - ireally needed some other peoples opinions as i was just getting lost in it all! thanks girls xxxx

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