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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

I have asked him to leave

41 replies

Yorkiegirl · 06/06/2005 07:25

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OP posts:
rickman · 06/06/2005 07:27

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hotmummy · 06/06/2005 07:34

Yorkiegirl- I hope you are OK. Rickman is right it sounds like he needs the kick of the Arse.

Hope you work things out.
Take care of yourself.

LGJ · 06/06/2005 07:46

YG

If he wants to sort this out then this is the shock he needs.

If it is beyond repair, it is in my opinion better to sever all ties as soon you have the strength, than hobble on indefinitely.

If you don't find the strength this time you will next time.

Look at Titania, Mr T is on the back foot, has agreed to counselling and is sleeping on the couch.

What I am trying to say is you will find the strength from somewhere.

noddyholder · 06/06/2005 07:51

you have done the right thing he probably never thought you would.try and stick to your guns and don't let him see you upset he will soon see things clear after the reality sets in xx

anorak · 06/06/2005 08:28

Hi yorkiegirl. I think you're right - he won't stop talking to this woman because there's nothing to make him stop. Childish, eh? But I agree, he needs to show his commitment to you by having nothing more to do with her. Time he grew up and began to demonstrate a little loyalty to his marriage. This way you're clearly saying that he can't indulge in this behaviour and have the privelege of being your dh too.

I hope he makes the right decision. It will do him good to work for it.

Evesmama · 06/06/2005 08:34

so sorry yorkie.

he does need to realise that no matter how trivial he thinks this phone call/friendship is...it really couldnt be more innapropriate and he must take into consideration how he would feel if it were the other way round...he sounds like he likes the attention and is ignoring your feelings, so he needs to start showing you much more respect and that should start by respecting your feelings.

i think work may help you 'think' of something else???

i really hope you feel better and get things sorted..big hug honey

SenoraPostrophe · 06/06/2005 08:40

Like Evesmama says.

I think he'll see that something so "trivial" isn't worth breaking up his marriage for though. At least I hope he does.

Have a good day at work and look after yourself.

Amanda1 · 06/06/2005 09:09

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Hausfrau · 06/06/2005 09:11

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Hulababy · 06/06/2005 09:12

Oh yorkiegirl. So sorry it has come to this. I really do hope his sees sense and you can sort it out soon.

If you fancy just getting out with the girls for a bit, give me a shout.

TracyK · 06/06/2005 09:12

Sorry to hear YG - but maybe we need to treat men like babies - they need the 'naughty step' to make them see sense!!

marthamoo · 06/06/2005 09:16

I'm sorry things have gone from bad to worse, YG - I've been away for a bit so am not up to date. I hope this gives him a shock and makes him think a lot more seriously about everything.

Titania · 06/06/2005 09:18

oh hun. has he gone yet? dont take him back unless its on YOUR terms and your terms only......

please....if you need me you know where i am...anytime. I mean that. take care. thinking of you. MSN me and i will give you my phone number. I know i cant do much but im here as a shoulder to cry on if you need it. x x

coppertop · 06/06/2005 09:19

YG - I'm so sorry that your dh can't see see that this is about more than just a simple phone call. xx

BethAndHerBrood · 06/06/2005 10:42

So sorry yorkie, but giving him a shock like this could bring him to his senses.

ninah · 06/06/2005 10:51

I think you have done the right thing yg I do hope your dh can rise to the challenge and you get things back on track
grrrrrr to this interfering woman.

Chuffed · 06/06/2005 11:10

((((((hugs))))))
This is over much more than a phonecall and don't doubt yourself at all!!!!

GeorginaA · 06/06/2005 11:12

Well done, Yorkie. I know it was a really tough decision, but I think you've done the right thing.

I hope he wakes up and sees what a complete arse he has been.

trefusis · 06/06/2005 11:25

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Tortington · 06/06/2005 11:39

good for you! decisive action ...excellent

Marina · 06/06/2005 11:42

YG, I am so sorry it has come to this. I've been away a bit too and had not realised he still hadn't got this deeply stupid and upsetting situation sorted out. Like others here, I damn well hope it brings him to his senses.

roisin · 06/06/2005 11:48

I'm very very sad for you.

Newbarnsleygirl · 06/06/2005 11:51

YG, so sorry to hear that

snafu · 06/06/2005 11:53

Really sorry to hear it's come to this, yg. Like everyone else, I hope this gives him the slap-upside-the-head he so sorely needs.

piffle · 06/06/2005 11:53

I'm so sorry that it has gone this far for you, it has been a desperately diffcult time for you
Wishing you love and hugs and strength, if there is anything I can do, pls let me know and I really mean it
Piff/Jane