nicknaming your private parts... own up

[DONTtouchMUMSspecialJUICE]

so... i'll start. i've had in the past.

for male and female genetalia

feline and rooster

superman and superwoman aka clark and kara in public

hulk and cleo

currently mr and miss ferret

boobs have been named

big sue and wee betty

my friends boobs have the best nickname of winthorpe and churchstone

so.. whats your nicknames you gave them.. past and present or just your favs?

[DemmitGel]

Pointing him at Chris Evans more like.

You lot are barking!!!

[Prunerz]

Oh
My
Fucking
God

You loons. You talk during sex? To Bertha the Bum?? Percy Pointer? To your Axe Wound? [shudder]

[Malificence]

They are just our "bits",
when hubby had his snip I would ask him "how are your bits today" - then he would get them out and show me his wounds while I made sympathetic noises.

We don't even call each other by our actual names, ever.

I must try " will you stick your pork sword into my fanjo" - he would probably vomit!

I do like the tantric words of lignam ( penis) and yoni (vagina) though - very poetic. I asked him to give me a yoni massage once and pushed a book about tantric sex his way, it is lovely.

[FlamingoBingo]

Malificence!

I don't fancy saying that to DH - he might get ideas

I do very occassionally say jokey, tongue in cheek ones like 'love hole' and 'wand of love' but it just makes me and DH piss ourselves laughing - doesn't really help us when talking about sex! There is no way either of us would do that with an iota of seriousness about it!

[DONTtouchMUMSspecialJUICE]

you dont use them DURING sex.. well i dont... not sure about others.

its a humour thing. and as said allows talking about it seem less crude.

also good if your both at work and trying to get each other "in the mood" by sending naughty text... personally i find talking about cocks and fanaye's just a little too much detail and vulgar.

much funnier yet still gets the point across if you use your nickname...

plus... if your in public... lets you drop a sneaky hint to you OH whats in store or if your up for some sex when you get home... without anyone else having a clue what your on about.

good in the prescence of small ears too.

[BunnyLebowski]

Can I just clarify that my Pork Sword and Axe Wound was tongue in cheek?! I can't believe anyone actually thought we used them

Can you imagine 'Come give my axe wound some loving darling!'

We do not have names for our bits. We are moderately sane.

[Prunerz]

Malificence

I met a Dr Ramalingam once. It was hard to keep a straight face.

[DemmitGel]

Oh yes, Bunny, a likely story. You are just embarrassed now. It's fine. You are among like-minded people.

[DONTtouchMUMSspecialJUICE]

for example... exdp used to say "betty and sue look fab in that top/dress"...

was much better than

"your tits look great.. cant wait to get you home and see them out of it"

especially if we were in public.

if someone overhears the word tits thats embarassing.... but betty and sue is not.

[DemmitGel]

Hmm think I might have to disagree with you there, SpecialJuice! I think Betty and Sue are just a teeny tiny bit embarrassing.

[DONTtouchMUMSspecialJUICE]

hey... its not that odd. in RL nearly everyone i know has them.

so either MNetters are pretending they dont

or the ones who do are missing...

where is shiney.... bet you she has used nicknames

she did know where to find those weird kinky teddy bears afterall.

[DemmitGel]

Hey I'm only teasing you. I do think you're barking, but I am thinking of you as nicely bonkers.

[BunnyLebowski]

pmsl demmit

I'd be worried for my own mental health if I referred to my foufou (don't use that one either) as my axe wound .

[DONTtouchMUMSspecialJUICE]

ah..... nicely bonkers.... i like it.

[wheniwishuponastar]

glad to hear that axe wound was a joke - cos its a horrible expression!