Feeling really down I feel like my relationship with DH is getting worse and worse. We have a DS of 18 months and a DD of 7 weeks. It takes next to nothing to set us at each other and the way we speak to each other and the things we say are far nastier than anything I have ever known in a relationship before. Every day I vow that I won?t lose the rag with him but then he says something nasty, spiteful or malicious to me and it sets me off. I want to be better, I want to not react, I hate the atmosphere around our children and I hate what all this nastiness is doing to our marriage.
I feel that he has no respect for me never mind love for me, there is certainly no tenderness, no desire and no companionship most days and I seriously fear for our future and feel like I can?t breathe because I do love him so much and can?t bear the thought of being without him. Then on other days, rare ones admittedly, he is his old self, caring, funny even affectionate. That?s when I wonder if it is in my head that we are falling apart but I don?t think it is.
I have tried to talk to him but he just blocks me out with yes/no answers and infuriating comments like ?yes dear, whatever you say dear?. The things he is saying are getting worse. He told me the other day that he blames me for all our joint debt because he didn?t have any when we met. He told me today that it could be arranged that he was no longer my husband. All this takes place in front of the kids. He is affectionate to DS but just ignores DD, she is my responsibility and he?d rather play games on face book than tend to her, there is no bonding whatsoever.
I don?t really expect advice as it is hard for any of you to suggest anything based on a snippet like this but I feel like I am drowning and dread family time, and what makes it so hard is the lack of sleep and the hormones raging through me, I can?t decide if I am overeating or not.
Any tips to be the ?better man? would be greatly appreciated.