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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

family feud

4 replies

Ginga66 · 18/06/2009 20:51

I am at my wits end. Sometimes I feel like I would die without DH, others that I want a divorce.
I cannot believe he is as childish as he is.
Our baby boy is having a baptism soon and we are planning invites. My DH and my brother are persona non grata to each other - because my DH does not like my bro's attitude which I admit sucks. But I want my baby's uncle to be in his life.
Anyhow my bro wanted to visit and my DH said not until he is out of the house. I told my bro (who is having an affair with a woman who cant stand me and vice versa). He got angry and toldf my mother who then proceeded to be rude about hubby as sticking up for son. Long story short bro not coming to baptism and hubby and I not speaking. The argument seems very small but it has ben brewing for soooo long and really I don't understand why my DH cannot rise above his petty feud for the sake of his son. My mother thinks he wants to alienate me from my family. He cracks wise remarks about my brother and I should have got hitched etc. His vehemence is astounding. Because I got so angry I shouted and cussed etc he is now not speaking to me. I don't know what to do!

OP posts:
TheProvincialLady · 18/06/2009 20:53

If your mum thinks he is trying to alienate you from your family then you need to think very seriously about whether it is true, and if so then why, eg control/abuse etc.

FabBakerGirlIsBack · 18/06/2009 20:54

I am tempted to tell the boys to grow up.

shhhh · 18/06/2009 23:15

I disagree with provincial......Just because your mum thinks that doesn't mean she is right. IMO mums never want their dk's fighting. I know what my mum is like about my sister and I...she always wanted us to be close and tried to put guilt on us..never worked.BUT now older and wiser we are quite good mates.

Dh's mums is the same. "Oh my boys are so close" not really true. At times im sure she thinks that when dh's voices his opinion i have some control...I don't. BUT it doesn't stop his mum thinking that...

Or even my mum thinking that if dh & I argue etc. "Oh my poor baby". They get upset as its their child..makes sense..?

Like fabbaker said, I would get the 2 men together and sit down and discuss it as adults. Its their ds/dn's christening and thats what matters. Try and see if they will be civil for 1 day..good luck x

TheProvincialLady · 19/06/2009 12:51

shhhh I don't say that the mum is right - she might well be completely wrong. But if someone close to you thinks that, it is certainly worth giving some serious thought to the matter.

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