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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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3 replies

pullyourselftogether · 16/06/2009 22:03

I know there are much more serious threads here but hope you will bear with me for a minute... I'm a single mum in my 40s, haven't had a relationship since my welcome split just over 1.5 years ago from disastrous dad of my gorgeous toddler. Not really been interested in anyone, so busy, lack confidence, looks are a mess, never go out etc, but having said all that would love a proper family life for me and my boy and I know I'd love to be in a relationship, just never get out to meet anyone.

Well, a new man has just started at work - I've really fallen for him What shall I do? Have asked men out in the past, reasonable success, but now have very little confidence in myself, and would love to be 'chased' a bit to be honest. I think he may be single, possibly a bit younger than me. He's only here for 6 month contract, so do I try to flirt with him? suss him out from afar? leave it all to him if he's interested??

Would hate to miss such a rare opportunity but don't really see why he'd go for me (and is it a lot to ask for someone to go out with a single mum of a very young child?). Don't know whether to pursue or admire from afar... Don't get me wrong, I haven't got us married off already, just wouldn't mind a bit of a thing and see where it leads. Should I be active or passive?? Now I really look forward to going to work ;) !!! Any advice??? thanks xx

OP posts:
TripleTroubleMuffin · 16/06/2009 22:05

view him as a potential new friend, that's all.
good basis for a relationship anyway and if it doesn't develop into anything further, he might have a gorgeous friend...

Spero · 16/06/2009 22:09

I'm not sure its such a good idea with anything in life to just sit back and wait for things to happen... BUT it is equally a blow to your self esteem if you flirt madly and get knocked back. So, try to find some middle ground. Show that you like him and see where it goes.

mrsboogie · 16/06/2009 22:17

Just get friendly with him and see what happens. Go out for drinks and have a laugh.

But you say your looks are "a mess". if you don't feel attractive you are less likely to be attractive to others.

Get that sorted - get the hair done,some yummy mummy clothes, wear nice make up, bit of exercise - whatever it takes to make you feel good about yourself. If it doesn't make him notice you it will make some one else notice you!

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