Twice in 3 days, I have responded to DH exactly as my mother did to me and my sisters when we were having an argument: well, then, go and do what you like!!
Dh wanted a fish tank which we cannot afford. We have had to apply for benefits to keep head above water. I have been supporting family for 5 months on benefits and my small income. Now he has a little bit of money, i assumed he would put it in the joint pot, but instead he wanted to spend a couple of hundred pounds on a fish tank.
After arguing about it for about an hour I said that he shoudl just go and buy the bloody thing then. Not constructive, not helpful and obviously not what I want. My mother would repond like that if we pestered her enough and I hated it because it seemed like she did not care what we did. Yet that is exactly what I do. (DH said the next day that he realises fish tank is not a good idea and will not be getting one yet)
We had a similar argument today: i asked for X amount for joint account, Dh replied he needs the money for his creditors, I said we need at least part of it for rent and food. he said blah blah blah , i said well keep the lot then.
Not constructive, not helpful and again not what I want for my family.
DH has been behaving like a child a lot recently and I have been responding like a tired, jaded mother.
How the f*ck do i break this pathetic cycle????
DH is quick to argue at the moment and I a fed up with having to shut up and keep the peace.