Should I go and see him?

[NoMoreNagging]

I've just left my h and moved back home to be near family, initially on a trial period. We have 2 dc and they have quickly settled into new school and I am starting to feel relaxed for the first time in years.

When we lived together h used to be so grumpy and all he could do was nag about things when he was home, we never did things together and he always left me to deal with any problems to do with school, the house, budgeting on a really tight housekeeping allowance even though he could afford more, anything really.

We agreed that I should go back to my home town as we were all so unhappy but since then h has been saying he misses us and he loves me and he wants me to go and see him for 3 or 4 days. Somehow I have the feeling he wants me to go and sort his washing out and clean up, that's all he needed me for before and he has been spoilt and never had to do it before in his life (thanks MIL)
He has been drinking and philosophising in long emails and phone calls. What should I do? I don't really want to go yet and he keeps saying he wants to see me but not the dc yet. They aren't even missing him because he never did anything with them except to nag or tell them to be quiet. When I say this he says he was happy to just have our shadows in the background and now everything feels empty.

He's abroad in Europe so I he wants me to fly out for a few days alone. I can't get my head clear to think straight about what I really want but I don't want to live out there again, I love the UK and although he has been applying for jobs here he has had no luck yet so he is stuck in his present job for another couple of years.

do you have to have contact with him?

can you block his calls and emails?

why should you have to listen to this drivel? who cares exactly what you said in your emails from 43 days ago. what matters is you're nearly free from him. cut the final ties.

"life couldn't be better where we are now and my dc are so happy "

err you said it yourself!

how can this be messing it up.
leave him to his problems.

let him sort himself out.

of course he knows what he said. he is trying to mess with your heaad.

no phone contact, no emails. no contact.

kids arent msising him. neither should you.
leave him to his problems he is an adult.

I really don't understand your confusion and distress NMN

stop feeling sorry for him, don't let him put words in your mouth

you seperated for you to gain some perspective didn't you? You sound like you are achieving it except for allowing him to fuck with your head from a distance. So any muddled communication you have had in the past is null and void

cut contact, other than precisely about the dc

if he pesters you for some answers, tell him you need more time and are not prepared to re-hash old ground over and over

tbh though, I think you are going to have to make your mind up quite soon. Do you want him back or not. It would not be fair to him to keep him hanging if you don't

make a clean break now if that is what you want, his pathetic whinings are designed to cloud your mind

Too insensed to read the whole thread.

Ther is nothign wrong with him. He just wants someone to clean up after him, wash his clothes, cook his food and fuck him.

He's realised what he has done all right. He has lost his slave.

How can you even consider seeing someone who doesn't want to see his own children?

I agree with you fbg

nothing like good hard shock of reality for the pathetic creeps to start snivelling....

I so heart Barcelona. That is all.