Does everyone else find real people fighting videos sick?

[Supercherry]

Or is it just me. Just found a load of them on DP's phone. One is where a teenage boy wails this woman up the face, I didn't watch anymore. I asked DP if he liked them- he said he thought they were funny and actually the woman lamps the man. I just feel sickened and I can't stand the thought of my partner liking them.

Am I just being really fucking hormonal here or am I right to be sickened? I just said to him I hate violence, I grew up watching my dad be violent to my mum, my ex was violent, I can't stand violence.

This has upset me, he just rolled his eyes and said 'whatever' as if to say here we go again. I do have really strong reactions to things. I can't help it. I can't hide my feelings, it's just not me.

What do you think?

I do sympathise, but can't really say anything useful. Maybe counselling would help, if he wants to hang on to your relationship. Sounds as though you would be fixing it up, though.

I divorced from a violent ex, but he was horrible to all the women in his life, you could see the pattern. Had the same double personality though, and did the nice to get me thing too.

Thanks Nigbynight. I can't even tell how bad it is myself anymore. He's abusive, but he doesn't show the same signs as other abusive men as he's not controlling. He seems really angry all the time lately and has a really short fuse. He has never hit me or anything and I'm not scared of him- although he is scary. Does that make sense?

Well he got angry again tonight and headbutted the door and punched it. I told him to leave. I had no choice. I don't want that kind of atmosphere for DS.

I suppose I'm not being very nice to him but that's because I struggle to be nice to someone who speaks to me the way he does.

I took DS for a drive to get him to sleep and to get out of the house while he got his things and when I got back his car was still outside so I locked my car door and waited. He came up to my car and kind of spat/licked my window. How weird is that?

He's gone now.

I dunno - you have been through it with a violent ex so you know the signs to look for.
Dont like the sound of headbutting and punching the door.

Sorry to hear this, Supercherry. Personally, I would find this very hard to move beyond.

Supercherry

He spat/licked the window !? Are you OK ? This is worrying.

Does anyone in RL know what's going on?

Please keep safe

I'm OK thank you, screamingadab, well, pissed off and fed up but OK. It's over between us (again). He's staying at his mums. I've spoken to MIL. She said she doesn't take sides, I don't think she thinks it's that bad but she does agree with me that we can't live together.

I don't want to tell anyone else the details just yet, there doesn't seem much point really.

I do wonder if counselling might help me though as I do seem to attract nobs.

DP or xp actually said I've got a screw loose and that I'll end up lonely. I pointed out that someone who headbutts doors isn't exactly sane either. I agree I must be mad to have put up with the verbal abuse, and breaking things etc. I have a tendency to fall for the apologies and promises.

I'm 4mths pregnant, DS is 15mths- it's going to be hard isn't it?

Sorry you are going through this. No its not easy is it. But it sounds as though you have been through a lot already, and you will be strong enough to face this too.

Please dont listen to him saying that you have a screw lose etc. My ex trotted out similar lines when we split. It's just refusing to take responsibility and blaming you. I am sure you won't end up lonely, just make sure you dont attract another headbanger!

Hope you are OK tonight.