I realise this may be petty compared to other posters problems but it has really upset me

[cheltenhamgal]

I met my chap a year ago today, leading up to Christmas life was peachy and we got along brilliantly but recently this seems to have totally changed.
Prior to this I have been single for 6 years after leaving an abusive relationship.
A couple of weeks ago we had a bit of a falling out but we got through it. Yesterday he was coming round for dinner after his shift. I was cooking a meal in celebration of us having made the one year mark, a bit too early as it turns out.
He had suggested that we go on holiday later on in the year for a week abroad(this discussion took place in Jan)and I was a little cautious as I havent been on holiday with a partner for more than 15years. So he suggested maybe just going for a couple of days, I said no no lets make it a week. Recently he has come round more to the idea of us going away for a whole week so I have been getting really excited and planning things ready for us to book at the end of May. Any thing we have chatted about has been based on us going away for a week.
Well last night he said that he has changed his mind and we should just go away for a couple of days, I have arranged child care for a week, etc so I got a bit uppity and said well I am still going away for a week even if I have to go on my own, there was some stony silence and he then asked if I wanted him to go, to which I replied I dont know( I really didnt as I was so mad at him and there was dinner cooking) As a result he stormed out, slamming the door and waking my dd up
He then called me asking if he should drop my stuff round( a dressing gown i had left at his)to which I said that I was mad and that I didnt think that now was such a good time, so he put the phone down on me.
I am upset as to me it shows how little he thinks of me to just storm out like that when I had gone to such an effort for the evening and now am not sure where I stand ?

fair enough then - perhaps you could say instead that you have the time to take a week's beach holiday, and you would like for him to join you on it for as many days as he can manage? At his own expense of course

well we can but see, I have text him but I work on a site where you have to hand your phone in before entering so I won't get a reply if any til I finish work today

Shame I went out as I would have said your text was perfect except for "sorry for the way I behaved last night".

Its too subservient and 'child appealing to parent after being on the naughty step' -like.

Just a note for future reference.

You have made the first move by sending a nice text, no need to show your hand all at once, plenty of time for that sort of apology once he has made an effort back.

Hope it gets resolved

thanks ChocFridgeCake, I was advised by a friend to maybe put that lol but hey whats done is done )we shall see if I have a reply when I switch my phone back on. To be truthful, we both help friends out in their restaurant(tomorrow night) which was the other reason for trying to be civil as I wouldnt want anyone to realise if that makes sense

on the whole i think there is too much thinking going on and not enough talking.

stop trying to second guess as you end up taking things the wrong way and just ask straight out. you'll avoid a lot of heartache that way.

well i text him at 1230 and he didnt reply and whereas i appreciate he is busy, a busy but will talk later wouldnt have gone amiss !

I didnt post at the weekend as I was too upset, he eventually text back after 2100 saying that he had been busy.
He agreed to talk and said Sat when I was free.
I called him Sat morning to ask when and where, had to leave a voicemail. He called me back, when I asked when and where he said whenever and put the phone down on me, I called him back thinking we had been cut off(terrible reception in our town) but it wasnt.
I then regrettably decided to go round his house, he wouldnt come down to the door straightaway but when he did, stood in the doorway so I couldnt go in. He obviously wasn't in the mood to talk and had just woken up so I said that he wasn't being very fair and that things couldnt carry on like this and it all got a little heated.
I left and he called me and I said that I couldnt carry on the conversation as I needed to be calmer, things again got a little heated and he told me that he would stop his two girls(age 14 and 15)babysitting my dd(age9) he did actually promise me that he would never do that as he did with his previous ex.
I have actually spoken to their mum and she is more than happy for them to carry on babysitting for me.
When I had calmed down I called him and said it was a shame that things had ended up like this and he admitted that things had got out of hand. He didnt want us to have a break or split up to which I said well things cant carry on like this though can they. I know he has got stuff going on that he is trying to deal with.
At the moment I dont know which way to turn, I am appalled at his behaviour as this isnt the guy I fell for. I have text him saying that i think we need to chat to find out if we want to find a way forward but am not sure if I have done the right thing
When things had calmed down later he called me

the when things had calmed down later bit at the end should have been deleted sorry