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Do you and your partner have different religious beliefs (both practising and non-)?

42 replies

MrsMerryHenry · 22/04/2009 16:41

If so what impact does it have on your lives?

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MrsMerryHenry · 22/04/2009 17:33

So it's all about God, then, ABetaDad? Can't be doing with the guilt stuff meself, and I'd forgotten Methodists are mostly anti-booze. I'm with you!

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MrsMerryHenry · 22/04/2009 17:34

LMAO at nun fantasy!

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ABetaDad · 22/04/2009 17:40

MrsMerry - glad it is not just me then. Now if only they had church services down the pub. .

I'm pretty keen on a 'God figure' but I really think he/she does not mind me having a drink and a lottery ticket now and then.

MrsMerryHenry · 22/04/2009 17:43

Hahaha! I have a friend who'd love to run a church in a pub! If he ever manages it I'll let you know! I always think of the water into wine thing and think He/She is okay with booze! As for the lottery...well, you should be racked with...guilt!!

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TheHedgeWitchIsNAK · 22/04/2009 17:52

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

cory · 22/04/2009 18:34

I'm a Christian (go to church in my friend's living room, very select congregation ), dh is an agnostic (or possibly atheist). No problem, really. As far as morals go there doesn't seem to be any difference between us. And we are both happy to explain to the children in the terms of 'this is what I believe' rather than 'this is what you have to believe.

junglist1 · 22/04/2009 18:52

I'm catholic, P is muslim. Our children aren't christened or circumcised. I feel bad because I want them to have a religion. If P was a practising Muslim it might be easier because he'd push the issue more, but he doesn't fast or anything. His family practice, but due to problems between me and them don't really see the kids (some problems due to fact I'm not Muslim). It's a minefield I tells ya

YanknCock · 22/04/2009 19:04

I was baptised Catholic, went to 12 years of Catholic school, and was forced into being confirmed by my Dad (who himself was sent off to the seminary to train for priesthood when he was 14).

In the wake of all that, I'm agnostic, and am wary of organised religion of any sort.

DH was christened C of E, but his family never went to church and weren't religious at all. He is sort of in the place of 'searching for meaning' and tends toward a lot of the eastern traditions. He meditates and has a mahoosive collection of books on eastern religion/philosophy.

Occasionally he's tried to get me into meditation or get me to read some of the more philosophical stuff, but he knows it's not really my thing. I feel a little bad about it, but basically the minute any person, organisation, or book tries to prescribe HOW I should live/be spiritual/think, I have a complete mental wall that goes up! That's what years of indoctrination does to you.

We're trying to figure out the whole christening thing. We didn't get married in a church because we thought it was hypocritical, and I can't see having a religious ceremony for the kid either (regardless of how commonplace it is to do this and never go to church again). If anything, I'd probably like a Humanist baby-naming thing, but imagine some family would be weirded out by it. My Dad will be particularly upset that we're not baptising Catholic; he never gives up hope, but at least he's not still putting 'So you're a lapsed Catholic' brochures in my suitcase when I visit!

bluebump · 22/04/2009 19:06

I am Jewish but fairly non practicing (brought up with non Jewish Dad so have never been very religious at all and have celebrated Christian stuff as well.) My DP is a non practicing Christian (not even sure what 'type'!)

It's never caused us any issues, in fact DP is as interested in Jewish life as I am and when he read the info about a recent programme on a Jewish celebration that said "adults get drunk and the kids go wild" he thought Jewish life sounded ok by him! He also refers to DS as Jewish as he knows Judaism passes down the female line.

ObsidianBlackbirdMcNight · 22/04/2009 20:10

I'm atheist, DH is muslim. Very little. He lives a secular lifestyle but has genuine religious beliefs. Impacts on me only at ramadan when he gets narky from lack of fags during the day. We don't argue about religion, don't discuss it a lot. Families aren't bothered. DS will be circumcised but will also be vegetarian so we both get to impose our irrational beliefs on him

But.......I know muslim men with atheist wives where there are issues about how she dresses, what she drinks, where she socialises. I wouldn't have married a guy who had problems with that, no matter whether I loved him or not - I am who I am and not changing

junglist1 · 22/04/2009 20:27

I understand what you're saying Kat, some of my P's relatives and friends are shocked that I go out with my mates etc, their views are much more traditional. They would never have touched me with a barge pole, TBH. The shock on their faces when P moaned about the washing up not being done and I told him to do it his f ing self! i wish I could have frozen that moment forever

MrsMerryHenry · 23/04/2009 11:51

Junglist, am I right in guessing then that your in-laws are unhappy that you don't conform to their cultural/ religious expectations of a wife? Or am I reading far too much into your words?

YanknCock (hi! glad you've kept your name ), if it's any help we are both practising Christians though not affiliated to a church. We didn't want to christen DS so we organised our own naming ceremony at his 1st bday party - inspired by our friends' humanist ceremony. It was incredibly touching (I cried), and even if we are part of a church when we have another DC I would still do exactly the same thing.

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junglist1 · 23/04/2009 17:45

Lol you hit the nail on the head there! I think the final straw was when I asked MIL for a fag.

MrsMerryHenry · 24/04/2009 18:46
  • you cheeky minx!

It forever bemuses me why somebody who practises a particular faith would expect somebody who doesn't practise that faith to conform to its expectations.

Bizarre.

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Ragdoll12 · 07/08/2012 12:42

My husband and I are both Muslim, both Sunni but difference of opinion on many things gets so frustrating. I think mixed religions work if one of you doesn't feel so strongly but if you truly believe in something it gets hard. I'm a very 'to you your religion and me mine, even amongst other Muslims' but people are not so tolerant and want to shove their ways down ur throat which makes me become very defensive. Although he's not very practising, he's more into what his parents are into which makes him very stubborn. I started Ramadan a day earlier (differences of opinion on moonsightings, no kidding) and I did that in secret so his family don't end up calling me a Wahhabi or Arab sympathiser the usual insults that get thrown at people if they don't follow the local community leader like a flock of sheep with no logic or reasoning to question things, do our own research and make our minds up. We're all here to please our lord You all should do what feels right to you and don't let anyone tell you you're wrong cos end of the day it's between you and your lord. Or lack of. Ok sorry, rant over x

maras2 · 07/08/2012 13:57

Thread is over 3 years old.

Ragdoll12 · 07/08/2012 14:20

Woah I didnt even realise. Silly me

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