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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Oh no! I have a boyfriend, a proper boyfriend, after 6 years, what do I do?

21 replies

Pawslikepaddington · 21/04/2009 12:37

I am petrified! Although he is VERY lovely-I am scared scared scared scared scared! What must I avoid doing at all costs? Help me-I don't want him to find out I am a 4 toed monster with 6 eyes and hair on my back! I need advice on what NOT to do, especially as he is so nice!

OP posts:
smee · 21/04/2009 12:52

Drink lots..
Seriously, congrats. Don't panic. Take it at your pace and ENJOY.

Original poster
Pawslikepaddington · 21/04/2009 12:59

So far I have stayed at his once (when dd was at her dad's) and ended up with the worst stomach bug in the world, and he only has an ensuite bathroom which was mortifying, and he stayed at mine last night (huge step) and despite me explaining that dd is unable to do the doorknobs in the house she managed to open her door and mine and walk in on us . It is slowly unfurling before my very eyes! (But I am buying a stairgate today!).

OP posts:
Original poster
Pawslikepaddington · 21/04/2009 13:00

Walk in on us asleep that should say!

OP posts:
aseriouslyblondemoment · 21/04/2009 13:06

heyyyy!!
how you doing paddington lol
fab.news
just enjoy there girl!!

nikki1978 · 21/04/2009 14:35

Be yourself. Unless he sees you as you are (warts and all) you will always be trying too hard.

Have fun!

ninah · 21/04/2009 14:38

no advice but will watch with interest

Unlikelyamazonian · 21/04/2009 15:08

what on earth were you doing asleep??

Shagged out I hope

chattysoul · 21/04/2009 18:22

Well once you have recovered from the shock I would suggest you don't come across too needy or vulnerable and also try not to moan about how hard it is to be a single parent!
I would imagine this is what I would try and do somehow.

Good luck with it and please do keep us all posted!

peachyfox · 21/04/2009 18:26

Smile up at him (unless he's very short of course) then look away without saying anything. Drives them wild.

MuffinBaker · 21/04/2009 18:27

The only man I have ever been my true self with married me

MorrisZapp · 21/04/2009 18:31

My advice...

Be yourself, but keep something back. Don't give him 100% straight away.

Don't mention your ex partners at all, and if you have to mention them do so conversationally and not with bitterness.

DO NOT be tempted by lust-madness into doing household tasks for him. There's only one way that can end up going.

You'll never get back the early days, those days when he thinks you are a total sex goddess and would do anything at all just for one kiss. USE THE POWER.

Enjoy it and good luck!!!!! Another lamb to the slaughter

Numberfour · 21/04/2009 18:46

I LOVE MorrisZapp's advice .... if only I'd read it 5 years ago!!

I also love the smile and look away thing! THAT still works on my lovely DH.

Just lovely lovely news! Don't know you from a bar of soap, never read one of your posts before, but you've got me smiling....

Original poster
Pawslikepaddington · 21/04/2009 20:13

Thank you all-am so excited! Have already told him a) I can't cook (infact he is cooking for me when we eat at the mo-ha ha!) and b) I have no intention of losing any weight/getting any fitter in the foreseeable future, just so he knows where he stands . I am so excited-he feels really different somehow-totally not the type I would go for normally. The only problem I do have (god this is embarrassing!) is that for the first time ever I have met a guy that is WAY better than me in bed, and has a rather large manhood-how do I get better fast, and find ways of it not feeling rather uncomfortable without hurting his feelings?

OP posts:
peachyfox · 21/04/2009 20:18

Oh my word your cup is overflowing Paws!

MuffinBaker · 21/04/2009 20:36

How is he better than you in bed?

surely it is how the two of you fit/work together?

Original poster
Pawslikepaddington · 21/04/2009 23:38

Hence the fear Peachyfox-this is the coolest, most surreal experience with men ever!! It is more that it goes really well and then I always seem to ruin it somehow-like not being able to keep up . Oh I am so happy, I have a proper boyfriend that hasn't made me sad or miserable within a week and doesn't still live at his mums at 37!

OP posts:
peachyfox · 22/04/2009 07:06

Paws, I met my boyf on an internet dating site over two years ago. He was embarrassingly good-looking with an amazing body, a phd and a flat with a cool roof terrace. I used to jokingly referred to him to my friends as 'hot guy' and I waited for 'the chat'. We're now expecting our first baby!

Knob only normal sized though...

Enjoy, Paws, the first bit of a relationship is absolutely wonderful (not better than the rest, but wonderful all the same...)

vezzie · 22/04/2009 10:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Original poster
Pawslikepaddington · 22/04/2009 22:15

Vezzie-you have got it in one-ow ow ow ow ow!!! I do have very happy rosy cheeks and a constant smile all the time at the mo tho-I am so happy-I actually cannot ever remember being this happy-everything in my life (well, not everything, that would be weird!) is lovely-yaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!!! I love your story peachyfox!

OP posts:
Monty100 · 23/04/2009 22:55

Paws - fantastic, long may it last.

Morriszapp - R-E-S-P-E-C-T

Alibabaandthe40nappies · 24/04/2009 10:40

Paws congratulations

I'm with Muffin Baker - the first man I was truely myself with married me.

I am fortunate enough to have the same problem with DH regarding penetration and can confirm with helpfulness of massage with oil.

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