Speaking to ex...bad or not?

[clara71]

I went out with this guy when I was 20 (now37) was on a break from my now husband. I broke the guys heart first love and all.

I have currently started talking to him via email & text and stil have few feelings..He currently lives with someone 300 miles away (who has 2 kids to her ex).

I love my husband but am not in love with him.
The weired thing is, he will text/email me all week long during the day but nothing of a night/weekend. Am I mad to carry on talking to my friend or not?

I have 2 kids 7 & 3.

You're mad to carry on. Stop now or it will end in tears.

You're mad to carry on. But you know that, or you wouldn't be posting. It will end in tears.

Sorry - thought first post hadn't worked.

Hassled, was only with the guy 10 months. He was a lovely person.

Always wonder was he my soul mate?

But I know what your saying.

Bad news. If you don't love your husband, either try and fix it or split up.

I think the disclaimer on this section should be...

"If you're posting to ask whether it is a good idea to meet/phone/stalk/track down your ex boyfriend or first love you will get a resounding no. Oh and delete your Facebook/Friends reunited account whilst you're at it"

You may not be mad, but are you prepared for the possible fallout if you fall in love with eachother and have to leave your partners?

I suppose I am looking for a "yes it could work out" answer.

Yes, you need to be focussing your attentions on your marriage, not a past fling. It sounds like you might just be bored, and that's always fixable.

Yes it could work out, eventually. Sometimes these things do. You might leave the partner you have, he might leave his and you might live happily ever after. but if you want to leave your husband, maybe do that first and then explore the possibility of a future with someone else. It's never that easy though

i can't stop thinking about him though.

It's not a process without pain. Do you think he feels the same or is he just being friendly?

It's so hard to advise. All I can say is the fairest way to do it is to end the relationship you are in first but I know how hard that is.

You have three choices

Leave your husband now and then explore these feelings.

Explore these feelings then decide if you want to leave.

Cut of all contact right now.

actually - maybe four, but I don't think the last os possible which is to continue contact but only as friends and stop all flirtatious exchanges - ask him to stop if he is being flirtatious with you. Is he?

off not of

Treat people the way you want to be treated.

he's bored at work (hence it being all day but not evenings/weekends/family time)you want to leave your husband for him and he's merely seeing you as a diversion.
sort your relationship out and ditch mr bored.