Think I'm going out of my mind!

[peedoffnetter]

Help please, I recently posted about finding out my DH had been kissing a colleague. I'm 36 weeks pregnant and even tho I got some good advice and have decided to give marriage another go, this last week has been hell.

We've had three sessions of councelling but so far nothing earth-shattering has come to light, we can say everything to each other with or without the councellor. Thing is I'm so mad, haven't spoken to DH in 4 days, don't want to go anywhere, do anything, have zero interest in my unborn child and have started smoking again . Cannot stop crying and hate myself. Why am I f'n smoking when my baby needs all the help it can get!! My brain never stops going, I'm exhausted cos I'm not sleeping and really don't feel like going on. What in god's f'n name am i going to do?

Can't believe I feel like this, if any friends or family knew they wouldn't believe it - so not me

Tell someone. You need some support and chuck the fags out. Really feel for you. You need a friend not a cigarette.

Can't tell annyone, I'm too ashamed and embarrased and I don't want other's opinions of him, might talk to my doc.

Just so annoyed at myself that I can't move on

You know you need to stop smoking. Your baby hasn't done anything wrong, your husband has. Turn that stress onto sorting things out with him and not smoking.

What is it you want to do?

dont feel bad you cant move on. And dont worry that you are not feeling like yourself at the moment - you are pregnant and hormones will be all over the place.
Your h did this to you - is he helping you? or is he making you feel stupid for not being able to move on?

Wrt to the smoking - you know it is wrong so try and get help for that - but also dont beat yourself up - at 36weeks baby is fully formed and so not so harmful - but still not good.

P'eed off. I have been wondering how you were and my heart goes out to you. Perhaps it might help us help you if you tell us what has caused your most recent setback? I was thinking about you in the last few days especially, as there has been a thread with a lot of "one strike and he's out" protestations, from people who have never walked in our shoes....has that set you back at all?

What did you decide to do in the end about the STI checks/informing the OW's fiance? And where are you in accepting your DH's insistence that these were only kisses?

As others have said, your hormones are raging at the moment and that cannot be helping. You are at your most vulnerable. For many of us in your position, we stopped eating, lost loads of weight and therefore had the opportunity to put on the slap and look wonderful. But in the later stages of pregnancy, it is pretty impossible to look wonderful, isn't it?

I think talking to your GP might help. When you ring, ask for a double appointment. It might also help if you book a counselling session just for you? Doesn't have to be the relate counsellor you are seeing.

Also, I don't know if you are much of a writer, but you might find it helpful to write down the whole story. That helped me, as like you, I have told no-one my story.

I don't want your cry for help to get lost in a sea of other posts, so I am providing a link to your earlier post, in the hope that others will see, understand and offer some help. My thoughts are with you.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/709732-Would-love-some-advice-pls-DH-cheated